


After You Saved Me

by Intreker05



Category: Fear the Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Action/Adventure, F/F, Romance, Sexual Content, Sexual Tension, Slow Build, Survival, Walkers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-29
Updated: 2016-07-25
Packaged: 2018-06-05 07:42:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 39,901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6695917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Intreker05/pseuds/Intreker05
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set about seven weeks after the outbreak, Travis, Nick, Ofelia, and Alicia are separated from the rest of the group after a hoard comes through the center of town. They're rescued by a mysterious young woman with a quick wit and a kind heart, but are her motives really honest? Alicia can't tell, but she's definitely intrigued by her in a way that she never expected to be, and the two begin something that might be hard to leave behind.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. "It's a Good Thing You Saw Us."

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Note:  
> I want to make sure, from the start, to establish that this is not an Elyza Lex story. While I appreciate the amazing Fandom that exists, I feel like that character already belongs to others and I wanted to create something new, without the influence of The 100 or either actress; tocreate an organic story. As a queer writer, this was a concept I came up with when thinking about what might happen if a 17-year-old met a 19-year-old lesbian at a time of her life when everything was crazy and nothing made sense except for the fact that she might not be as straight as she thought she was. It's a slow burn romance that's worth the wait and I hope brings a smile to everyone face. And trust me...It's worth the wait.

Chapter One: “It’s a Good Thing You Saw Us”  
“Come on,” the woman yelled, stretching her hand down further from the open window so Alicia could reach it. “Hurry up. They’re right behind you.”

Alicia grabbed her arm and felt Travis’s hands beneath her feet as he helped boost her up to the second floor window. She fell in a heap, tangling with the stranger in what looked like it had been an old bedroom, though most of the furniture had been broken down; probably to make the boards and barricades across the first floor windows and doors. The woman pulled herself up, leaving Alicia to take care of herself, and reached back out the window. Nick came second, then Ofelia, Travis was last. 

Alicia stared at the window expectantly from where she’d slid out of the way, still expecting her mother to crawl through. Unfortunately, they’d been separated when the hoard came. Chris, Daniel, and her mother had been at the gas station across the street, the rest of them in a grocery store. There had been no way to get to them before the street was flooded and Alicia and the rest of them had been bolting out the back door.

“My girlfriend,” Travis breathed, still winded from the run through town. “The rest of our people are still out there.”

“Then they’re either dead or they found a hiding place. Until this hoard clears out, there’s nothing you can do. Unless you want to die out there,” the woman shut the window, swung across a metal grate that had been put on hinges, and locked it with a heavy padlock. 

She turned to face the group and it was the first time that Alicia got a look at her. She was younger than she’d originally thought but tired eyes and a haunted expression made her age pretty hard to guess. She had dark blonde hair pulled back in a messy ponytail and a scar next to her left eyebrow that looked fairly fresh. She was thin, but strong, her forearms corded with muscle, and Alicia could attest to the fact that it wasn’t just for show by how easily she’d pulled Travis through the window without anyone to help boost him up. There was a pistol on one hip, a hatchet on the other, faded jeans with dirt on both knees and a black t-shirt with a rip in the hem. Finally, Alicia saw several tattoos on her forearms and another one peeking out from the sleeve of her shirt but she was too far away to see what they were.

Alicia looked up and her eyes met the woman’s. She blushed and looked down, ashamed that she’d been caught assessing their savior. 

“I appreciate the help,” Travis said. “But I don’t know if we can stay.”

The woman grabbed Travis’s arm and pulled him over to the window. He looked down into the alley where they’d just been standing, a sea of rotting bodies, the moans and groans of the dead like bony fingers in his ears. 

“This is the only exit,” she said, looking down with him. “Give it a day or two and they’ll move on once they think the food’s gone. If they’re dead, they’re dead already and if they’re safe a day or two won’t matter. If you stay, I’ll help you look for them when we get around to it.”

“Why are you helping us?” Nick asked, eyes narrowing suspiciously.

He felt jumpy inside the building, unsure of his surroundings, a new place out of his control and he didn’t like it. 

“Because I’m not an asshole,” the woman shrugged. 

“I’m Travis,” Travis introduced himself. “Alicia, Nick, and Ofelia.”

“Zoe,” the woman said. “Come on, I’ll show you around.”

The building had been an old office building, transformed about fifteen years ago into an apartment building used by local university students. There were four units, each with three bedrooms, a bathroom, kitchen, and living room. The bottom floor had been transformed into storage space, bookshelves and desks and beds and chairs and tables being used as shelves for food and water, medical supplies, clothing and a hundred other things that Alicia could barely name as they walked quickly through the piles. Zoe kept up a running monologue as they covered the first floor and headed upstairs to the bedrooms. 

“This place must have been converted to an emergency shelter in the first few weeks after the outbreak. By the time I got here, though, the city was pretty much deserted. The way it was, I figure it was probably cleared out by the military or something. No walkers other than at the University. It was all locked up when I got here but without all the added security. I had an incident the first couple days I stayed here so I decided to lock up the first floor and live on the second. That window is the only way in or out.”

“That makes it pretty risky for you, doesn’t it?”

Zoe shrugged. “I’m pretty realistic. Walkers can’t get up to the second floor and if people get up here, they can keep all this shit for all I care but I’d probably be out of the game anyway. A back door wouldn’t help much if I get ambushed by enough firepower to get through the first floor barricades or the bars on the window.”

Zoe stopped in front of one of the second floor apartment doors, across from the one where they’d been rescued. “You’re all welcome to stay in here. The three bedrooms have bunk beds so there’s plenty of space for everyone and even a couch if you want privacy. There are still some books in the living room, a couple board games in one of the closets and I think a pack of cards in one of the kitchen drawers. I left it there because it wasn’t much use to me. I’ll grab some candles and supplies for you all out of storage and we’ll get you hunkered down for the night. Anyone want to come help me drag it up?”

“Sure,” Nick volunteered. He tapped his sister on the shoulder. “Come on.”

Alicia followed Zoe and her brother back down to the first floor. Zoe unlocked the door to one of the apartments and walked in. Alicia was still shocked by all the supplies. They’d been living on so little recently that all the excess seemed overkill. 

“Man, you could throw one hell of a party with this,” Nick breathed, eyes scanning the bottles of alcohol probably intended to be used as antiseptic.

“Probably,” Zoe agreed. “But I figure there’s always the chance that I’ll be stuck here for the next twenty years or so. I think I’ll keep it for now.”

Zoe grabbed a pair of duffle bags off a stack and handed one to Nick and one to Alicia. She filled them with a couple flashlights, some candles, blankets, a bar of soap, towels and a washcloth, hairbrush and comb, a pack of toothbrushes and a tube of toothpaste. “I probably forgot something but that should be enough to start with.”

Before they left, Zoe grabbed a couple five gallon gas cans. Alicia looked at her curiously. 

“I have water barrels at a couple locations nearby collecting rainwater. I filter out debris but I don’t purify it so you wouldn’t want to drink it but it’s good for baths and the toilet. I keep it in gas cans so I make sure I know the difference.”

“Makes sense,” Nick nodded. “It sounds like you’ve got quite a setup. How long have you been here?”

“About a month,” Zoe said, locking the door behind them and following Nick and Alicia up the stairs. “But it was easy with everything in place. A few days of hard work getting things setup but the supplies was already here. Two apartments worth of survival gear. It’s the best place I could have ended up.”

“How did you end up here?” Nick asked, sounding a little suspicious now.

“Dumb luck,” Zoe said, ending the conversation with her clipped tone.

Travis was sitting on the couch, thumbing through a magazine when they got back to the apartment. Ofelia must have been in one of the bedrooms because Alicia didn’t see her. She sat down the backpack on the small kitchen table and then stepped aside so Zoe could put down the jugs.

“I always try to have a good hot meal for dinner because those tend to be pretty rare nowadays. Would you like to join me?”

“I don’t know how much appetite we’ll have,” Travis said. “But we’ll take you up on the offer.”

“Sounds good. Get cleaned up and I’ll start cooking. You can join me across the hall when you’re done. Tomorrow, I’ll bring up enough water for a real bath and we can get you all some new clothes.”

“I really appreciate what you’re doing for us,” Travis said, really meaning it but still feeling suspicious, trained by all the things that had happened to them since they left LA. 

“Maybe I believe in karma,” Zoe shrugged. “I’m just treating you the way I’d want to be treated if the roles were reversed.”

“Do you really believe in karma?” Alicia asked.

Zoe smiled sadly. “I don’t know what I believe in anymore.”

\----------

Alicia was the first one across the hall. Zoe was crouched next to a camp stove, stirring a large pot of food. The smell of spices and a good, hearty meal smacked her in the face when she walked through the door. “That smells amazing,” Alicia nearly groaned. 

Zoe smiled and Alicia found herself thinking that the expression looked good on her. “I hope it tastes as good. It’s been a long time since someone else has eaten my cooking.”

“I’m sure it’ll be great,” Alicia said, a little surprised that she wanted this girl to like her. It felt like she was back in school again trying to make new friends. “Is there anything I can help you with?”

“There are plates and cups in that cabinet there and silverware in the drawer below it. You can set the table if you’d like.”

Alicia was halfway through setting the table when Nick walked in, water still dripping down his neck from where he had missed a spot. He rubbed at it with the back of his hand. “If you happen to have a razor and some shaving cream in that stockpile of yours, I wouldn’t turn it away.”

Zoe nodded and tasted the contents of the pot. “I’ll let you guys go on a little shopping spree downstairs tomorrow morning to get anything you might need.”

“You’re not going to like, kill us in our sleep or something,” Nick said, flopping down in a chair. “I’m suspicious of kindness.”

“Well, I wasn’t planning on it. But now that you’ve put the idea in my head, you’d better sleep with one eye open,” Zoe smiled dangerously and Alicia found that the look made her breath catch in her chest, but not in the way she expected. 

She tore her eyes away from the woman and went back to setting the table. 

“Maybe you can sleep with me tonight and keep me safe,” Nick grinned, leaning forward on the table, his elbows nearly in his plate. 

“Sorry, Nick,” Zoe said, turning her attention back to the stew. “You have certain qualities that I’m just not looking for in a partner.”

“Dashing good looks, a great personality, a witty sense of humor,” Nick kept grinning.

“A penis,” Zoe stated and Nick almost fell out of his chair. 

Alicia barked a laugh at her brother’s embarrassment but swallowed it quickly when Zoe looked up at her with a grin. 

“Figures that the one hot girl left after the apocalypse would be gay.”

“Not the only hot girl left,” Zoe said, glancing at Alicia out of the corner of her eye, “just the only one you have access to right now. I’m sure you’ll have other options. And even if you don’t, at least you’ll have some privacy tonight.”

“Eww,” Alicia’s lip curled in disgust. “How about we talk about something else?”

“Fine,” Nick leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest. “How old are you?”

“Don’t you know never to ask a woman her age?” Zoe asked, stirring again and taking a taste. She seemed satisfied this time. 

“Yeah, I’ve been told that before but I’m a slow learner.”

Alicia finished setting the table and sat down next to her brother. Zoe stood up, slapping her thighs with her hands and using them to push off of. “Hopefully, I’ll turn twenty next month.”

“You’re younger than I thought,” Alicia said, a little surprised that she’d spoken. 

“Guess this new world kind of takes it out of you.”

“At least you’ve had it easy,” Nick said, locking his fingers behind his head and looking around the apartment when he spoke. “These are some pretty nice digs.”

“Yeah,” Zoe said, a hard look crossing her features. Alicia thought she almost saw the woman’s lip curl in a sneer. “Like I said, it was just dumb luck.”

Ofelia and Travis came in a few minutes later and it was mostly silence while everyone dug into bowls of chili and finished off an entire box of crackers. They washed it down with grape Kool-Aid and chocolate pudding and Travis leaned back at the end of the meal and patted his stomach happily. He was scared and nervous about Madison and Chris and he knew Ofelia was worried about her dad but Zoe was right, there was nothing they could do about it tonight. 

“This was a great meal,” Travis said. 

“Thanks,” Zoe cleared off the dishes and started washing them in a sink filled with gas can water. “I’m trying to avoid getting into the freeze dried stuff and the MREs until the last minute so I’m using the good stuff first. A year from now, it probably won’t be as good.”

Alicia got up from the table and started helping Zoe with the dishes. The other woman shot her a quick smile as silent thanks.

“Do you really think you could stay here for a year?” Ofelia asked, refilling her cup from the pitcher in the middle of the table. 

“I’ll stay here as long as I can,” Zoe said. “I’ve seen what’s out there, heard the stories. There was another survivor who moved through here a few weeks ago but he moved out pretty quickly. All I want is a safe place to lay my head at night, and that seems like a pretty rare thing out there.”

“But don’t you think it would be better if you had more people. Safety and companionship, right?” Ofelia looked sad, thinking about her friends in a life that seemed like it had happened to someone else. 

Zoe shrugged. “Maybe, but also danger, more chances for trouble, for crime, for violence, and for idiots who think they have bright ideas and just end up making things worse.”

“We’ve run into a few of those,” Nick agreed.

“I’ll stay here until someone or something forces me out but hopefully that won’t happen anytime soon. I’m pretty comfortable here.”

“Still,” Alicia said, quietly. “It has to get pretty lonely here.”

Zoe smiled sadly. “You have no idea.”

Travis stifled a yawn with the back of his hand and smiled apologetically. “I’m afraid I’m not going to be very good company tonight. I think I’m going to go ahead and get some sleep. Hopefully things will look better in the morning and we can go looking for everyone.”

Zoe nodded her goodnight to Ofelia, Travis, and Nick. Nick paused at the door but Alicia waved him away. “I’ll be over there as soon as I’m done.”

Nick rolled his eyes but he didn’t say anything and walked across the hallway, making sure to leave the door open to both apartments. 

“Is he worried that I’m going to murder you?”

“Probably,” Alicia laughed. 

Zoe shook her head. “You guys must have seen some shit.”

“You have no idea,” Alicia said, staring at the dirty, soapy water, not seeing it.

“Yeah,” Zoe said, quietly. “I’ve got a pretty good idea.”

The pair finished doing the dishes in silence. Alicia wiped her hands with a towel and handed it to Zoe so she could do the same. The silence in the room stretched between them, surprisingly comfortable. Zoe smiled slightly, a gentle curve of her lips, as Alicia met her eyes. 

“I should probably get back to my family. I need some sleep, too.”

“Go for it,” Zoe nodded, hanging the towel back on the bar next to the sink.

Alicia walked out of the room and Zoe leaned against the counter, letting out a deep breath she didn’t know she’d been holding. She was surprised when Alicia stuck her head back into the room. 

“Thank you for helping us out. It’s a good thing you saw us.”

“Yeah,” Zoe nodded. “It really is.”


	2. "That Didn't Go Quite the Way I'd Planned"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoe takes Travis, Nick, Alicia, and Ofelia out of the safe house in search of the others after seeing smoke in the distance and considering it their best lead. While in the city, they enter a world where the dead still reign and a single bad decision puts all of them at risk. Zoe makes a choice that might cost her her life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note:  
> A little more action in this chapter. I'm just asking you to be a little patient when it comes to the relationship because character development is important to me in this one. I didn't want to write a one-shot and I can see this story continuing for a while so I want to make sure the base is there.

Chapter 2: “That Didn’t Go Quite the Way I’d Planned”

Zoe ran a brush through her hair, pulled it back in a ponytail that was slightly neater than the one she’d worn yesterday, pulled a long sleeve shirt over her t-shirt against the cool morning air. She’d already been up for an hour so she knew the street was clear, the walkers having wandered away with the rest of the hoard at some point in the middle of the night while everyone had slept and she’d sat in her room, hand tight around the necklace that she tucked into her pocket each morning, counting from one to one hundred and back again until the sun rose above the horizon. In the watery, pink-fingered morning of dawn, she’d opened the locked window, climbed up to the roof using the emergency ladder she’d hung a few weeks ago, pulling it down as quietly as she could with a rope almost hidden along the window frame. 

Nothing seemed changed from the day before. With binoculars she could see the last few stragglers of the horde on the interstate out of town, just cresting the hill and disappearing down the other side. She couldn’t see anything else out of place. At least, not at first. On the second pass, Zoe noticed a thin stream of smoke curling up in the glare of the new sun coming from the north on the other side of the university campus. It was out of the way, away from any main roads and towards the center of town. She’d been there a week earlier, making a supply run for medical textbooks and supplies from the nursing school, and hadn’t seen anyone or anything. Of course, it could be nothing, a busted generator, an electric spark. But that didn’t seem likely. 

By the time Travis and the others were crawling out of bed, Zoe was already packed and ready to go. She shoved granola bars at the four of them and holstered her pistol. “I think I saw something on the other side of the university campus. Smoke, which could be something or it could be nothing but we should check it out. The sooner the better. That way, if they decide to travel, they won’t have gotten far.”

“Then let’s go,” Travis said, cramming his granola bar into his mouth.

“Do you have weapons?”

Everyone nodded, disappearing back across the hallway to grab pistols, a hammer, a machete. Zoe waited, swallowing a mouthful of strong, instant coffee in the hopes that she wouldn’t drop in the middle of the run. It had been three days since she’d gotten any sleep and she was starting to feel it.

Finally, they’d reassembled and Zoe pulled a map out of her back pocket. She handed it to Travis. “I know the city but you don’t. If we get separated, find the nearest cross street. The safe house is marked on the map with a red dot and it’s the only place on the block with the first floor windows boarded up.”

Zoe pulled down the emergency ladder and let everyone else climb down to the street before tossing the ladder back up to the roof, the clatter of wooden steps on the roof breaking the morning quiet and making Zoe cringe. She jumped down to the street, bringing the pull rope with her which she tucked carefully away in a niche she’d made in the brick. 

“You leave the window open?” Nick asked. 

“If anyone went up there, they’d have to pull down the ladder or disturb it in some way. I’d just walk away and never come back if someone was in there.”

“And leave all that good shit behind,” Nick seemed surprised.

“Not worth my life,” Zoe adjusted her bag on her shoulders and took off in the direction she’d seen the smoke earlier. “Now stay quiet. There’s a chance the hoard could have left behind some stragglers.” 

The five crossed the city, staying well away from the walkers that they came across. There was a small number of them, half a dozen suck in the entryway to a movie theater, one stuck on a truck hitch, the ball caught under its ribcage where it fell, rotten hands clawing away at the tailgate in a mockery of desperation. Zoe jogged them across a street and onto the campus. 

“Be careful here,” she whispered. “Lots of walkers in a small space, especially in the buildings. You have to keep your eyes and ears open in case they’ve gotten any of the doors open. And don’t use firearms. There are enough busted windows that they’ll start pouring out if we make a lot of noise. The smoke came from behind the soccer field, probably around the buildings out back. It’s a twenty minute walk but let’s try to make it in ten.”

They jogged, trying to make as little noise as possible while covering as much ground as possible. They chewed up the distance, quick footsteps carrying them around the fence to the soccer fields. Zoe noticed a large group of dead grouped against the back fence near a supply shed. She could smell smoke in the air. She pulled to a quick stop and pointed. 

“Whoever was there, or is there, are definitely in that direction. Looks like most of the walkers are inside the fence but there could be some out in front.”

“So we need to draw them away from the building,” Travis said. 

“Or take them out,” Zoe loosened her hatchet from its place in her belt.

“I thought you wanted to do this quietly,” Travis looked at her with accusing eyes.

Zoe grinned at him. “Then the rescue mission is all yours. Knock yourself out. I’ll be over here when you need me.”

Alicia watched the woman take a few steps away from the group and cross her arms over her chest, nodding her head in the direction of the walkers. “Get to it, Travis.”

Travis circled the group. “Alright, we don’t know if our people are in there or not but it’s the best lead we have so Nick, skirt around the far side of the soccer field and draw the walkers by the building away. We’ll go get them out once you get them out of the way. Circle around the back side of the building and we can get back to the safe house. If we’re still welcome there.”

Travis said the last part loudly so Zoe could hear him. She smiled at him but this time the look didn’t reach her eyes and it made Alicia swallow hard. “If you’re still alive, you’re welcome. I have a strict no-dead policy.”

Nick started walking to the far side of the soccer field while Ofelia, Alicia, and Travis made their way around the other way and stopped about a hundred yards from the half-dozen walkers clawing at the closed steel door of the shed. Nick was surprised to hear footsteps behind him as Zoe jogged to catch up. 

“What are you doing here?” he asked. 

“Gonna try to keep you alive.”

“Why do you care?”

“I don’t, to be honest. But your sister might.”

“You know she’s straight, right?”

“Hey, way to totally miss the point, jackass,” Zoe rolled her eyes and quickly shut an open gate in the fence that Nick had missed. 

He swore under his breath. If he’d left it open, the walkers in the soccer field might have made it out when he drew the others away, putting his family at risk. 

“Then what is the point?” Nick growled low under his breath, the fear in his chest making him uncomfortable and irritable.

“Just forget about it,” Zoe growled back. “Let’s just hope your people are in there.”

They turned the corner at the end of the soccer field and Zoe hit the edge of the fence with the head of her hatchet. “Hey, shitbag, over here,” she called towards the walkers.

They looked up, rotting jaws and teeth click-clacking as they tasted the air. They moved as a group towards the pair, finding an easier target. Zoe noticed that the walkers in the soccer field had also been roused by the noise and were making their way towards them. Thankfully, the gate was closed and they’d still be trapped on this side of the fence. Zoe and Nick waited until the walkers were closer and started drawing them away from the building. Behind the walkers, Nick could see Travis, Alicia, and Ofelia crossing the space to the shed. 

“I sure hope it’s our people in there,” Nick said as they turned around a second out building, drawing the walkers further away. 

“We’ll worry about that when we get there,” Zoe snapped, not liking the fact that she was playing walker bait and she wasn’t even going to get the chance to take them out.

They were around the far side of the building, the walkers still following them. “Should be far enough away now that we can head back,” Nick said. 

No sooner were the words out of his mouth when they heard the crack of a gunshot. It echoed through the silence once it was gone. With a strangled cry, Nick bolted toward the sound. Zoe unholstered her own pistol and sprinted after him. She turned the corner a few steps after him and skidded to a stop. Nick, Travis, and Alicia were all standing in a huddled mass, surrounding a woman with blonde hair and a boy with dark hair. Ofelia was hugging an older man. Zoe put the pistol back in her holster and stepped towards the group. 

“Is everyone alright?” she asked. 

Travis looked up, eyes shining with tears. He nodded. “There was a walker caught in the doorframe that we didn’t see.”

“And you decided shooting it was the best option,” Zoe shook her head. “How are you all still alive?”

“I’ve asked myself the same thing quite often,” the man standing with Ofelia said.

“This is my girlfriend, Madison, Nick and Alicia’s mother. My son, Chris, and Ofelia’s father, Daniel.”

“Nice to meet you all,” Zoe said, looking up past the soccer field at the direction they’d come from. “But we need to get the hell out of here. We have company.”

Travis followed her eyes and saw the walkers, a small hoard of them, coming out of the college, from the tree line, even from behind the sheds, all drawn by the sound of the gun.

“Come on,” Zoe broke into a jog, finding a clear space between groups of walkers. “Stay close.”

She was in one of the green spaces around the campus. The founder of the university had been a Sierra Club member and had planted trees while he built buildings and most of the wood still remained. Zoe didn’t like it. There were too many things that could go wrong, but she didn’t have any other options. 

She raced through the trees, branches and walkers reaching for her. Thankfully, the walkers were few and far between and she was able to lead the group out the other side of the woods without many issues, at least until she emerged into an open space in an area between three buildings, a large fountain in the center with a statue of the university founder, smiling and waving at the masses of walkers, at least three hundred of them, crammed into the space. 

“Son of a bitch,” Zoe yelled, nearly careening into a walker that was standing near the woods. 

Zoe made a hard right, hoping that everyone else was following her. She skirted the edge of the courtyard, jumping over a few mangled corpses who had been the first out of the broken windows and unsuccessful in their escape. She looked back over her shoulder as she ran down the sidewalk between two buildings. They were still keeping up but Chris and Madison, near the back of the pack, were definitely close to danger. Zoe skidded to a stop. 

“Go,” she yelled as Travis ran by. “Get back to the safe house and wait for me there. If I’m not back in three days, it’s yours.”

Zoe pulled her hatchet out of her belt and hacked off the rotting hand of a walker as it reached for Alicia’s backpack. The girl tripped as the hand grabbed even though Zoe chopped it off. Alicia felt another hand grab for her bag and was sure that a walker had her. She had a hammer in her hand and started to swing with the claw end when a hand caught her wrist and pulled her to her feet by her backpack. 

“Don’t kill me before I get the chance to save you,” Zoe growled. 

Alicia swallowed hard and then pulled her eyes away from the other woman’s, surprised by how bright and blue they were, like a pool of clean water peering out from the blood and dirt streaked skin surrounding it. 

“Come on,” Zoe turned to catch up with the others when a walker lunged at her, knocking her to the ground and the breath out of her lungs. 

Alicia struck at it with her hammer, hitting it just above the right ear, caving in the side of its skull. Zoe pushed the dead thing off her and scrambled to her feet. Looking, she saw that everyone else had disappeared behind a wall of walkers and knew that route was no good. 

“That didn’t quite go the way I’d planned,” Zoe breathed, grabbing Alicia’s arm and pulling her after her into the building behind them. “We should be able to bunk down here for a while, maybe find a back exit. Come on.”

Alicia followed her, the swinging glass door slamming shut on a tidal wave of walkers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the action and I promise, your patients will pay off in the next chapter. With Alicia and Zoe alone, together, their relationship is about to take a big step forward. But, I'm also playing this from the perspective of a girl who isn't sure where she is on the spectrum so there are some questions she's going to have to ask herself before they get down to doing the dirty. It'll be worth it ;-)


	3. "I'd Do Anything to Have Them Back."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Separated from her family, Alicia finds herself counting on Zoe to keep her safe. A turn of events means Alicia's the one taking care of Zoe and learning more about herself, and the other woman, than either of them ever expected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note: I know this is a shorter chapter but I consider it a transition to an important part of the story. Chapter 4 is being worked on right now and should be up in the next few days. I hope you're enjoying it.

Chapter 3: “I’d Do Anything to Have Them Back”

Alicia bolted upright, her breath coming in short gasps. She grabbed for the hammer at her belt and was shocked not to find it there. She scrambled in the dark, reaching for it. 

“Woah there,” a comforting voice cut through the dark. A spark, a candle lit and a weak glow making a circle on the tile floor. 

Zoe crouched next to her, the warm light making her features golden, deepening the dark circles under her eyes. 

“Shit,” Alicia breathed. “Sorry about that. I must have dozed off.”

“It’s fine,” Zoe smiled. “We’re safe enough here for now and you need sleep.”

“So do you,” Alicia pointed out and Zoe laughed.

“I don’t sleep much anymore,” Zoe smiled sadly and settled back, grabbing a seat against a desk. 

They’d found a refuge in an abandoned classroom on the third floor of the building. The door was secure and the windows were all intact. Zoe had spent the morning checking the courtyard, waiting for the walkers to clear out, but they were staying and now, as the sun was starting to go down, she realized that she was going to need a new plan if they were going to get out of here in the morning. 

“Yeah, I bet,” Alicia nodded, pushing herself to a sitting position across from Zoe, her legs crossed in front of her. “At least I’ve got my mom and brother, and Travis I guess. He isn’t so bad.”

“He’s not,” Zoe agreed. “And he cares about you both. He takes care of you two.”

Alicia nodded again, then looked up at Zoe, their eyes meeting across the candlelight and Zoe felt her mouth suddenly go dry. “So what happened to you?”

“What do you mean?” Zoe asked, looking down at her chest and stomach, worried that she might be bleeding. 

“No, I mean, how’d you get here? What happened after the outbreak?”

Zoe swallowed hard. “I don’t really like to think about it,” she said, breaking eye contact and picking at a fingernail so she wouldn’t have to look up. 

“Please,” Alicia begged. “I really want to get to know you.”

“Why?” Zoe asked, looking up again, cocking her head to the side like a curious puppy.

Alicia would have smiled at the idea, comparing this woman with corded muscle and streaks of blood on her face and hands and shirt, with a puppy, but instead she just licked her lips and took a deep breath. 

“I don’t know why. I just do.”

“It’s probably not a good idea to make friends in this new world of ours. No one seems to last very long.”

“Or maybe it’s a sign that we need to take every chance we have because we never know how much time we have left,” Alicia said quietly, staring at her hands that were lying in her lap.

Zoe took a deep breath and then laid back on the floor, clasping her hands behind her head as a pillow. She stared up at the black ceiling past where the dim light of the candle could reach. 

“We were in Las Vegas when the outbreak started. My folks, my little brother, and I were there for vacation. Dad had a business trip so he took my little brother out of school and I took a couple days off work and we all flew out to Vegas for some fun in the city of sin. We’d been there for less than 24 hours when they started talking about a virus outbreak at one of the casinos. We thought maybe it was a stomach bug or something and they quarantined the casino. We didn’t think much about it. 

“Sure, we saw some weird shit on the news but it’s Vegas. Turns out, an outbreak can go unnoticed in a city like that for a long time. We were getting ready to fly back home the next morning when they started talking about issues on both coasts, Los Angeles lost power, they were talking about bringing in the military. We were stuck in our hotel room for two days before Dad finally said we needed to get out of there or we’d die in the city. But traffic was gridlocked, probably I every direction, so he emptied the minibar into my brother’s backpack and we started walking down the Strip. 

“It was chaos. There were walkers everywhere. We still didn’t know what we were looking at. Dad thought maybe it was drugs, or a gang war, or some kind of flu. We didn’t know shit. We were walking down the Strip when one of them grabbed Mom. We were walking together. I was holding her hand. Then suddenly, she wasn’t there anymore. It was behind a garbage can and I didn’t even see it. It just bit into her arm, ripped her away from me. There was nothing I could do. I tried to go back for her but by the time I’d taken half a dozen steps the thing made its way up to her throat and there was nothing any of us could do. 

“Dad took off. He just bolted, left her there to die without even trying to help. I grabbed Jake, my brother, and ran after him. We walked for a week or so, taking up with small groups of survivors when we could, scavenging from abandoned cars on the interstate. But Dad, he was acting different. He was getting crazy. I don’t know if he felt guilty or if he’d given up or what but he wasn’t sleeping and he was talking to himself. One night when I went to scavenge, I came back and he was beating the shit out of Jake because he’d accidentally knocked over a cup of water. 

“And I hit him. I just walked up to him when his fist was raised and I decked him, right in the jaw. Without a word I grabbed Jake and we just left. I just left my dad stranded there, alone.”

Zoe’s voice thickened and Alicia watched her in the flickering light. Zoe’s jaw clenched, loosened. She cleared her throat, took another breath, and started talking again.

“Jake and I walked for another week before we came across a farmhouse about fifteen miles out of town. We stayed there for a few days and were pretty comfortable. It was nice to take a break for a while and just spend some time together. We played cards and the place had a gas-powered generator so we watched DVDs and cooked a hot meal on the gas stove. We were getting ready to move on but we needed some supplies so I went to a gas station a couple miles up the road.”

Alicia saw Zoe’s fist clench as she continued the story and she found herself scooting across the floor, closer to the young woman with her knee nearly touching Zoe’s shoulder. Zoe turned her head slightly, resting it lightly against Alicia’s thigh. The contact sent a current of electricity through Alicia’s stomach but she pushed it aside, listening carefully.   
“The walker must have made some kind of noise because I know Jake wouldn’t have gone outside unless he thought someone was in trouble. He was a smart kid. So damn smart. But he was already gone by the time I got back. They’d torn him apart and what was left came back. I—” Zoe took a breath. “I put a bullet in his head, then in the three walkers. And I walked away and never looked back. I found the safe house a couple days after that and I’ve been there ever since.”

Alicia reached out and put a hand on Zoe’s head, gently touching the other woman. Zoe curled into the touch, silent tears freely running down her face. “This is the first time I’ve ever told anyone about them.”

“I had a boyfriend, before the outbreak. He was sick the last time I saw him. I’m pretty sure he turned,” Alicia said quietly. “But I can’t imagine losing my whole family. I don’t know what I’d do.”

“You make a choice,” Zoe said, her voice still thick with tears. “You decide whether or not you want to give up. And if you don’t give up, then you have to keep making that choice every morning when you wake up because it doesn’t get any easier. That’s why I don’t sleep. I see their faces every time I close my eyes.”

Alicia surprised herself then. She leaned over, her lips gently brushing Zoe’s forehead, lingering long enough so that she could feel the other woman’s skin beneath them. “Get some sleep,” she said quietly. “I’ll stay right here with you, wide awake. I won’t let anything hurt you.”

Zoe sobbed a quiet laugh and scrubbed the tears off her face with the back of one hand. “You’re not quite what I expected the first time I saw you,” she said. 

“What did you expect?”

“Typical teenage girl,” Zoe smiled. 

“Aren’t you supposed to be a typical teenage girl, too?” Alicia asked. 

“Guess there’s no such thing as typical anymore, is there?”

Alicia shook her head slowly. Zoe closed her eyes, leaning her head more solidly against Alicia’s leg, feeling her warmth next to her. She exhaled a slow breath. 

“I’d do anything to have them back,” Zoe breathed, already sounding sleepy. “I promise I’ll get you back to your family.”

“I know you will,” Alicia said quietly. “Now shh, and get some sleep.”

Within seconds, Zoe was asleep.


	4. "I Can't Promise You a Happy Ending."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A daring escape attempt has Zoe and Alicia fighting for their lives to make it back to the rest of the group.

Chapter 4: “I Can’t Promise You a Happy Ending.”

Zoe sat upright, grabbed her hatchet off the ground and was up and two steps away before a familiar voice brought her back to reality. 

“Zoe,” Alicia said, scrambling to her feet, not sure whether to back away from the woman or go towards her. “You’re alright. It’s me, Alicia. We’re safe.”

Zoe let her arm drop to her side, the hatchet dangling loosely in her grip. She sank to her knees and stared at the floor, trying to catch her breath in deep, sobbing gulps. It was the same every time. The same nightmare. Her brother’s eyes, yellowed with decay, half of his jaw ripped out, his favorite Red Sox t-shirt ripped and bloody, sticking to open wounds. The shiny, pink glint of ropy intestine visible through a gaping hole in his gut. Zoe swallowed hard, not wanting to lose her lunch on the floor in front of Alicia.

Thinking about the young woman brought her back to reality. She felt a warm hand on her shoulder, soft, hesitant, and it pulled her back the rest of the way. The image was gone. She was back in the classroom. The flicker of the emergency candle was still visible. Those things were supposed to last for sixty hours and it looked like it was true because barely any of it was gone. She took a final deep breath, stood, and turned around. 

“Sorry about that,” she breathed. 

“Don’t be,” Alicia smiled. “You were there for me earlier. Now it was my turn.”

Zoe chuckled mirthlessly. “We’ve got to stop meeting like this.”

“Maybe when we get back to the safe house,” Alicia offered. “We both need a good night of sleep somewhere that isn’t a floor.”

“It’ll probably be a few more days before I can get to sleep,” Zoe shrugged. “But I’ll manage.”

“What if I promise to stay with you?”

Zoe looked at her, narrowed her eyes. She couldn’t read Alicia. Her long brown hair was hiding part of her face and she was looking down, scraping the toe of one shoe with the other. Any other woman and Zoe would be pretty sure that she’d just gotten an invitation. But Nick had also been pretty certain that his sister wasn’t a lesbian and she’d had a boyfriend before the outbreak. Someone she’d obviously cared about enough to bring up when she’d been talking about her brother. Too bad Zoe couldn’t Facebook stalk her, maybe see if there were some pictures where she’d leaned into a female friend a little too hard or made eye contact just a little too long. The apocalypse was hell on the lesbian dating scene. 

“I—”, Zoe stuttered. “I guess that might help. But I don’t know how your family might feel about that.”

“I’m not asking you to sleep with me,” Alicia said, her voice strong and she looked up quickly, catching Zoe off guard. Then she laughed quietly and looked back down at her feet. “Actually, I guess I am. But maybe not in that way. And I don’t care what my family thinks or has to say about the whole situation.”

“Maybe?” Zoe asked, picking up on the one word that still gave her hope, even though she hadn’t really realized that she wanted any hope until she’d gone to sleep feeling the warmth of Alicia’s body and had felt the gentle touch of her lips on her forehead. 

Alicia smiled. “I don’t know what I am. I know that I made out with Madelyn Thomas under the bleachers at a home football game my sophomore year and that I’ve played a lot of truth or dare at sleepovers that ended up with someone taking their shirt off. But,” Alicia took a deep breath, “can we just go with this and not label it but say that it’s something and see what happens.”

Zoe nodded, hoping that she looked more certain than she felt. Because right now, her stomach was doing front flips. She checked her watch and saw that it was after midnight. She went over to the window and looked outside, happy for the distraction. It didn’t last long though. Alicia stepped up beside her and Zoe could feel her presence even though they weren’t touching. 

“How’s it look out there?”

“Looks like a lot of the courtyard has cleared out. Most of them have probably moved on somewhere else so we might be alright. I still think we should see if we can find a back entrance to this place.”

“It should have one,” Alicia agreed. “Aren’t buildings like this required to have more than one exit because of fire code or whatever?”

“Probably,” Zoe nodded. “If we can find a back stairway, I’m betting we’ll find the back entrance. Maybe even down the end of this hallway. But a back stairway could also mean a lot of walkers.”

“There are a lot of them everywhere,” Alicia muttered. “We might as well give it a shot.”

Zoe dug a couple emergency ration bars out of her backpack and a few sealed pouches of water and divided them up with Alicia. The water tasted like tin foil and the ration bars like sugar cookies so it wasn’t a bad meal. Zoe pulled out a flashlight and blew out the emergency candle, letting it cool before she tucked it back into her backpack. She knew she needed to be careful with the flashlight, but fumbling around in a dark staircase didn’t sound like a very good idea. 

“You still have your hammer, right?”

Alicia held up the weapon and Zoe nodded. 

“We need to make sure that we keep things quiet. Firing a gun in here would draw out all the walkers that seem to have forgotten about us.”

“Do we have a backup plan in case the back stairway is blocked?” Alicia asked, gulping down the last of her water and tossing the foil packet into a nearby trashcan. 

Zoe watched the foil packet disappear past the rim and smiled sadly. She shook her head to pull herself back to reality. “Run faster than they can,” she shrugged. “I don’t know the layout of the building. I can guess that it’s pretty standard to a college campus with emergency stairs at both ends, the elevators and the main staircase we took earlier in the center. I’m just guessing right now.”

Alicia could tell that she was getting frustrated so she walked over to her and put both her hands on Zoe’s shoulders. “I know you’re guessing, but you’re doing a great job and I trust you.”

“Normally when I have to escape a shitty situation, it’s just myself that I have to worry about.”

“I can help some. I haven’t gotten this far by being a total idiot. Just a partial one, at times.”

Zoe grinned. “Fair enough, but still this is new to me. The last time I had to look out for someone, it didn’t go so well.”

Alicia squeezed her shoulders. “Stop being hard on yourself.”

Zoe took a deep breath and took a step back so that Alicia’s hands fell off her shoulders. She saw the young woman’s eyes drop, sadness and rejection clear on her face. Zoe swallowed hard and gave her ponytail a vicious tug. 

“I’m sorry,” she said, swinging her backpack over one shoulder. “Game face. I’ll make it up to you but I can’t be distracted right now. At least, any more than I already am.”  
Alicia smiled and nodded, the sadness and rejection draining away, replaced with determination. She had been honest. She didn’t know what this was, or what was going to happen. But she knew in that moment that she wanted Zoe to be able to make it up to her. And for that to happen, she needed to survive.

Zoe tightened the backpack on her shoulders so it wouldn’t make as much sound and with a deep breath, they walked into the hallway. Zoe put the flashlight under her shirt to filter the light so that only a dim glow made it through the fabric. But it was dark enough in the hallway, and the light was strong enough, that she could see into the shadows. The hall was quiet, still, and she listened carefully, nearly holding her breath to see if she could hear the soft groans of the dead in the darkness. She didn’t, so she walked down the hallway, slowly, stepping as quietly as she could. 

Alicia followed behind her and Zoe was impressed. She stayed close enough to not get lost but not so close that either of them would hit each other with their weapons in a fight. She moved slowly and carefully, her sneakers making quiet sounds on the hard tile floors but nothing more than a whisper. They made it to the door at the back of the hallway without running into anyone or anything. Zoe paused at the door, pressing her ear to the cool wood. There was no window and it was really too thick to hear through so she could do little more than guess what was waiting on the other side. 

“Get ready,” Zoe whispered over her shoulder.

She pushed open the door slowly, grimacing as it groaned and squeaked. She shone her flashlight through the crack in the door, thinking that it was more important to see what was on the other side than to guess. She didn’t see anything, but with the door open she could smell the distinct rot of human flesh and hear the groans and moans that made her stomach flip. They weren’t on this landing but outside the door, she couldn’t tell if they were above or below. She pushed the door open wider and skimmed the flashlight over both sets of stairs. They were empty. 

“We definitely have some company. How do you want to handle it?”

“I think we should keep going,” Alicia whispered, breathing a little faster now that they were closer to the walkers.

“We’re on the fourth floor. If we run into anything that we can’t handle before we get to the exit, try to make it back up here and back to that classroom. If we get separated, head back towards the city and find Bellview Lane. It runs north/south through the middle of town. Get to the corner of Bellview and Oak and the safe house is right there.”

“We won’t get separated,” Alicia said, trying to sound confident. 

Zoe nodded, letting her eyes linger on Alicia’s face for a moment longer, looking at her lips, her jaw, her cheekbones. She finally tore her gaze away and walked into the stairway. Alicia quietly shut the door behind them and the pair started slowly working their way down the steps. They met the first walker on the second floor landing and Zoe was able to sink her hatchet into its skull before it even noticed they were there. There was another walker on the steps and this one saw them, letting out an angry, groaning hiss of air. It was missing its lower jaw which made it less dangerous but Zoe didn’t want to risk getting scratched and clawed at either. Alicia took this one, stepping into its path to block Zoe and sinking the claws of her hammer into its forehead. 

When it was dead and she’d pulled out the hammer with a wet sucking noise, she turned to Zoe with a small curve of her lips. “I can’t let you have all the fun.”

Zoe was a little surprised. Behind her brother and Travis, she seemed happy to let them lead the way but now she seemed different, more in control, more confident. Zoe could definitely get used to the idea. Alicia led the way down to the next landing where they ran into three more walkers. This one got a little tricky when Alicia got her hammer stuck in the skull of one of them when it fell sideways, slamming the hammer deeper into the bone. The third walker grabbed at her arm, bony fingers scrabbling for a handful of flesh to tear. Zoe’s hatchet caught it first in the throat, throwing it backwards onto the stairs leading up, its head hitting the corner of one of the steps. Zoe didn’t give it time to get up before she was on top of it, sinking her hatchet deep into its skull through its cloudy eyes.

Pulling the hatchet out, she noticed that her teeth were bared in a silent snarl and it surprised her. It was one of the first times in a long time that she’d been fighting for the safety of someone other than herself, of someone she cared about. Alicia didn’t say anything but she looked at Zoe with appreciation and relief and she took the last flight of stairs quickly. Her look of relief turned to fear and then desperation as she pushed against the door bar and it didn’t budge. 

“It’s locked,” she groaned, sliding to the floor with her head in her hands. 

Zoe smiled and crouched down beside her. “Have a little faith in me, Alicia. I always come prepared.”

She put down her backpack and pulled out a thin, metal pry bar. She then zipped the bag back up and put it on her shoulders. She looked at the door with her flashlight, crouching close to the lock, and sighed. 

“There’s not much space between the door and the frame. I’ll have to use my hatched to jam the pry bar in so I can jimmy the latch. It’s going to be loud and it’ll probably bring a few unwanted visitors.”

“I’ve got your back,” Alicia smiled as Zoe helped her up. 

It took all her self-control, standing there in the dark, Alicia’s hand in hers, her face inches from her lips, for Zoe to let her go and turn back to the door. With a slow smile that Zoe didn’t see, Alicia turned to the stairs, gripping her hammer tightly in her hand.

Zoe shoved the pry bar in as far as she could just with her hands, making sure to line it up with the latch. “Here we go,” she said.

With a loud clang of metal on metal, Zoe hit the pry bar with the back of her hatchet. She grimaced at the noise, the echo, but she continued, working as quickly as possible. Half a dozen quick strikes and the pry bar was in. She pushed hard towards the door frame and the door popped open. Outside the door, half-a-dozen walkers were drawing near to investigate the noise. 

“We’ve got company,” Alicia cautioned as she heard the noise of a few walkers falling and sliding down the stairs from above them. 

“Come on,” Zoe reached for her arm and pulled her out into the cool night air, slamming the door behind them. “At least out here there’s more room to fight.”

She gripped the pry bar in her left hand, the hatchet in the other, and turned on the walkers. One was ahead of the others and she took a step forward and slammed the back of her hatchet into the side of its skull, crushing it with the blow. It fell, momentum driving it forward so that it wrapped one arm around Zoe’s knees. She stumbled, nearly falling into another walker. Alicia caught this one, aiming poorly and catching it in the chin with the flat side of the hammer. But it worked and the walker was thrown off enough that Zoe was able to regain her balance. 

She turned and with a single motion, drove the pry bar through the eye of a nearby walker as it reached out an arm to grab at her shirt. She stepped backwards, out of the way as it fell, and the pry bar slid out with a slick, sucking noise. From behind her, Alicia let out a muffled yell. With a knot in her stomach, Zoe turned to see Alicia on her back, an unseen walker had been dragging itself across the ground and had reached out to grab her, tripping her and making her fall hard. A second walker was learning over her, a few quick steps from the first bite, its jaws click-clacking eagerly. 

Zoe sprinted and quickly made up the distance, driving her shoulder into the walker and sending it tumbling into some nearby bushes. She pulled Alicia up, nearly picking the young woman up off the ground without any help, and wrapping a protective arm around her back, pushed her away from other walkers that were crowding into the space. 

“Come on,” Zoe said. “We’ve cleared enough room to get out of here.”

They jogged away from the building, following an empty sidewalk around the side of the university campus and back towards town. A quarter mile away from the campus, when they’d gone a far enough distance and hadn’t seen any walkers, Zoe slowed to a walk. Alicia slowed as well, keeping pace with the other woman. Zoe took a deep breath and turned to look at Alicia with a smile on her face. 

When she saw her, though, the smile faded. Alicia was clutching her arm, blood already leaking through her fingers and running down to drip off her hand onto the pavement. Zoe pulled her to a stop and pushed her into the relative safety of a deserted storefront. 

“What happened?” Zoe’s stomach twisted and she swallowed hard to keep from throwing up. “Did you get bit?”

She pulled Alicia’s hand away from the wound.

“No,” Alicia said, seeing the desperation in Zoe’s face, in the way that her hands ran across Alicia’s wounded arm all the way up to her shoulder to flutter helplessly against her neck. “I’m fine,” she grabbed Zoe’s hands in hers. “When I fell I scraped my elbow on the concrete. Here.”

Alicia turned over her arm so that her elbow was facing out towards Zoe. There were jagged lines in her elbow and up the back of her arm, blood leaking from dozens of tiny scrapes and cuts to pool together and run in rivulets down her smooth skin. It wasn’t a bite. It wasn’t even that deep. Just large and bloody and Zoe let out a deep breath that she didn’t know she’d been holding. 

“You scared the shit out of me,” she scolded. 

Alicia smiled meekly. “Sorry about that.”

Zoe took of her backpack and pulled off the long sleeve t-shirt she was still wearing. She shredded it quickly, using the blade of her hatchet to nick the fabric, and wrapped it around Alicia’s arm, creating a makeshift compression bandage. She was still wrapping Alicia’s arm when the other woman ran a warm finger over the tattoo on her forearm.  
Alicia could see them now, as close as she was, even in the darkness with only a half moon to light their way. She saw goosebumps break out on Zoe’s skin and she knew they had nothing to do with the cool night air. 

“I saw these the other day when we got here,” Alicia said. “They look amazing.”

On the inside of Zoe’s left arm was a small book, the pages open to say “My story is far from over” in black script. On her right arm was a wristband in brown ink that looked like leather and Alicia wanted to reach out and touch it to see if maybe it was leather because it looked so real. It looked like there was a Celtic knot stamped on the back of her arm. On the back of her right arm, just below her elbow, a pair of dog tags with the chain disappearing into the sleeve of her t-shirt. On one, a date, “January 17, 2008” the other, a name “Alexander Cunningham”, a social security number, religious preference, blood type. 

“What do they mean?”

Zoe smiled, turning her left arm over so Alicia could get a closer look. “I got this one when I was sixteen actually, when I came out. My parents had a rough time of it. It was homeless for a few months and I had a girlfriend who was a tattoo artist. She did this for my sixteenth birthday, to remind me that even in the rough times and on the bad days, if I keep going forward then I give myself the chance to continue my story. I got the cuff to cover up a stupid pair of hearts I got at the same time after she and I broke up. My family’s from Ireland so I thought it looked good and fit. And these,” she brushed the dog tags with the tips of her fingers. 

“This is for my older brother, Alex. He was killed in Afghanistan. He was six years older than me. We always drove each other crazy but he was there for me. He joined up right after high school, Marines, infantry. He was a badass. Two deployments and he was almost done but he volunteered to extend his enlistment and go back with his unit. He didn’t come home.”

Alicia put her hand on Zoe’s, trapping it against her tattoo, and pulled her in closer. Zoe let herself feel the warmth of the other woman’s arms, of her body, of her skin. “What about your other tattoos?”

“What other ones,” Zoe smiled around the words. 

Alicia’s free hand tugged at the sleeve of Zoe’s t-shirt. “You know which ones I’m talking about.”

Zoe grinned and turned her head to look at Alicia. “How about I promise to show you later when we’re a little safer when we are now?”

“I’m going to hold you to it.”

Zoe leaned in, trapping Alicia’s lips beneath hers. She felt Alicia stiffen beneath her kiss at first but then she relaxed, leaning into the kiss, pulling at Zoe’s t-shirt to pull her in closer. Zoe pushed her back until she bumped against the wall of the storefront. Zoe pushed against her, kissing her hard, with more desperation than she thought possible. And Alicia was pulling against her, wondering if there was a point between them where they stopped being two people and became one because she wanted to stay in that space and her breath was coming in short gasps and Zoe’s lips were warm and soft on hers and she dug her fingertips into the other woman’s bicep that was hard and tight under her t-shirt because of how tightly she was holding on.

With a moan that sounded like she was in pain, Zoe finally pulled away. “We need to stop,” she breathed. “I need to stop. We’re not safe here and I am very quickly losing control when it comes to you.”

Alicia couldn’t stop smiling but she was also shaking a little and part of her felt like she wanted to cry. She leaned her forehead against Zoe’s to steady herself, took a deep breath, and squeezed her eyes shut. She felt Zoe’s warm hand slide across her cheek, wrapping around the back of her neck and pulling her in close. “Are you alright?” Zoe whispered.

Alicia nodded, not trusting herself to talk. Zoe pulled away and took Alicia’s hand in hers. They walked like that across the city, Alicia a few steps behind, wrapped in her thoughts. Zoe was careful and cautious as they walked, skirting the occasional walker they came across, not wanting to ruin her mood with blood and violence. She felt a little uncertain though. Alicia looked like she wasn’t sure about what had happened and Zoe hoped she hadn’t pushed the other woman into something she wasn’t comfortable with. 

Zoe saw light in the window as they walked down the alley towards the safe house. She saw Travis’s head silhouetted in the bars and he pushed them open and threw down the ladder with a loud clunking noise that made Zoe cringe. She couldn’t really blame him for being excited. “Madison, Nick, they’re back,” he yelled over his shoulder. 

Zoe helped Alicia climb the rope ladder and followed behind her, turning and pulling up the ladder, closing the window, and locking the grate behind her so she could give them some privacy. She felt a little awkward now, still feeling Alicia’s lips on hers, the burn of her fingers in her biceps. She was certain that there would be marks if she pulled up her sleeve. She turned and saw Alicia in the middle of a large family reunion. Zoe instantly decided that she needed to leave and walked out of the room to her bedroom, shutting the door behind her. She leaned her head against the cool wood for a few seconds, taking deep breaths. She knew she was jealous, jealous of Alicia getting time with her family, of her family getting time with her, of being incredibly aware of exactly how alone she was in this world. 

She pulled off her backpack and tossed it in one corner. She’d spent some time converting the room into a place she was comfortable with. The bed had several layers of wool blankets, cold nights alone making for bad nights of sleep, and a sheet because the wool made her itchy. She had two pillows in the bed because she normally sat up all night reading from the stacks of books in the room, most shoved into a pair of bookcases that she’d moved into the room. There was desk against one wall with a notebook and a pair of pens, several maps. The closet was fairly bare, a few pairs of jeans, shirts, a leather jacket and a winter coat. She could shop downstairs anytime she wanted from more clothes she’d ever need so she didn’t bother bringing much upstairs. 

Zoe stretched. She needed a shower but she wasn’t in the mood to leave her room so she changed into a pair of sweat pants and a new t-shirt, lit a pair of candles that were in a couple bean cans on her bedside table, grabbed a book of the top of a stack, and hopped in bed. She’d barely made it past the first paragraph when there was a knock on the door. 

“Come in,” Zoe called, using her index finger to keep her place in her book.

She was expecting Nick, Travis, maybe even Madison. They seemed like people who needed to say thank you or get some kind of closure with the situation. She was surprised to see Alicia there.

“Hey,” Alicia said, quiet, looking at the floor. 

“Come on in if you want,” Zoe said. “I don’t want you to get in trouble with your group though.”

“They already went to bed. They hadn’t slept of course and were falling asleep standing up. Mom wanted to sleep by my bed like I was still a little kid but I put a stop to that. I told them that I just wanted to thank you for helping me out again and then I’m going to sleep on the couch.”

“That couch isn’t very comfortable,” Zoe smiled. 

“Is that an invitation?”

Zoe smiled and patted the bed next to her. Alicia stepped into the room, shutting the door behind her, and sat down at the end of the bed. She took a deep breath and looked at Zoe, already getting lost in the other woman’s gaze. “About earlier,” Alicia started. 

Zoe interrupted her. “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”

“You didn’t,” Alicia reassured her, smiling. She wasn’t used to seeing Zoe off balance like she was now, a little uncomfortable, a little uncertain. It made Alicia feel in control, powerful, she scooted a little closer on the bed. “It felt very comfortable. It felt, well, amazing. And I guess that just caught me off guard. I thought there’d be a difference between kissing guys and girls but I didn’t expect it to be such a huge difference. That kiss took my breath away and that’s never happened before.”

Zoe smiled. “I’m not sure that it has anything to do with the difference between kissing guys and girls. I think it’s just us. I think we have a connection. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t attracted to you and interested in you. I don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow, much less further than that down the line, but I know I want to be with you.”

“I can’t promise you a happy ending,” Alicia smiled sadly but her heart felt warm, full. For a minute, she felt like a normal teenage girl, talking to her crush about taking their relationship to the next level. 

Zoe tossed her book on the floor and leaned forward, pulling Alicia closer to her until the other woman was sitting in her lap and Zoe was propped up against the headboard. She kept one arm around Alicia’s back, the other resting gently on her thigh. Their faces were close together, Zoe could feel Alicia’s warm breath on her lips. 

“Happy endings always belonged in Disney movies anyway. I don’t need a promise of anything, much less a happy ending. I just want now, with you, and to enjoy every second that we have together starting with this one.”

Alicia leaned forward, this time taking the lead, and kissed Zoe hard, wrapping a hand behind her head and pulling the other girl close. Zoe wasn’t sure how long they’d kissed but when they finally parted, she was out of breath and her lips felt bruised and swollen. She felt a familiar longing in the pit of her stomach. 

“You need to get some rest,” Zoe said, noticing the sleepy dark circles under Alicia’s eyes. She’d stayed up all afternoon while Zoe slept and it was close to four in the morning by now. 

Alicia shook her head. “There’s plenty of time to sleep. There’s a lot that I need to learn about being with girls,” she leaned over and blew out the candles, “and I need you to teach me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope all of you enjoyed this chapter. Needless to say, the next one is going to be my thanks to you for sticking with the story and will be beautiful, fantastic sexy-times. Hope you've enjoyed the ride.


	5. "That's Lesson Number Two."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoe takes some time out of the apocalypse to teach Alicia an important lession.

Chapter 5: “That’s Lesson Number Two.”

“So what’s the difference between sex with a woman and sex with a guy?” Alicia was propped up on her elbow, watching Zoe in the weak moonlight filtering in through the grate on the window. 

“How am I supposed to know?” Zoe smiled up at her.

They’d spent a while making out and it had taken all her restraint not to take off Alicia’s clothes and have her way with the other woman, but she also wanted her first time to be special and for her not to be as nervous as she seemed to be. So she was taking her time, even though the feeling in the pit of her stomach was pulling her towards clothes ripping, skin scratching, furniture breaking sex. 

“I guess I just figured that you’d had sex with guys before.”

Zoe shook her head. “I’m a gold star lesbian, actually. I’ve always been interested in women. I had my first girlfriend when I was eight and lost my virginity to a girl on my swim team when I was fourteen.”

“Really?” Alicia seemed in awe. 

“What about you?”

“I’ve had a few boyfriends, one serious. The one I told you about. He took my virginity about eight months ago. I guess I’m fairly new to this, then.”

“There’s nothing wrong with that,” Zoe leaned up and gave her a quick kiss on the lips. “We all have to start somewhere. Like I said, I can teach you. Besides, sometimes it’s better this way.”

“How?”

“Well, I guess people who are really experienced, they can be set in their ways. I dated a girl once who was really pissed at me because I couldn’t get off the same way her ex could and instead of communicating with me and actually learning what I like, she just kept trying to do the same thing. That didn’t last long.”

“Sounds pretty funny, though.”

“Hilarious,” Zoe laughed. “But, for your original question, from what I’ve seen and heard, I think the best difference is that sex between women because a lot of it involves us taking turns, like me getting you off and then you getting me off, it means I get to devote all my time and focus to your pleasure.”

“Taking turns?”

Zoe smiled and with a quick move, flipped Alicia so that she was on her back and now Zoe was leaning over her. “Why don’t I give you your first lesson?”

Alicia nodded nervously and chewed on her lower lip. Zoe kissed her to distract her, feeling the young woman relax as her kiss deepened. She sucked her lower lip in her mouth, soothing where the other woman’s teeth had made gentle indentations on the skin. Alicia let out a quiet, deep moan that made Zoe’s stomach do a pleasant flip and it took every bit of control she had to not speed things up. 

While they were kissing, Zoe slowly slid her hand under Alicia’s shirt, running her hand gently across the smooth skin of her stomach. Each time she slid her hand across the warm skin, she moved it higher, until her fingers grazed the bottom edge of her bra. Zoe felt Alicia’s breathing change under her lips. She was almost panting now, soft gasps against Zoe’s mouth as they kissed and Zoe’s hand kept sliding higher until she cupped Alicia’s breast and squeezed gently. Alicia whimpered and Zoe pulled away slowly, looking down at the young woman beneath her. 

Alicia’s lips were parted, slightly swollen after all the kissing they’d done that night. “Is that alright?” Zoe whispered. 

Alicia couldn’t find the words to answer so she just nodded, another whimper and Zoe ducked her head back down and found Alicia’s lips again. This time, as she kissed the other woman, she moved aside the fabric that separated her hand from the flesh beneath it and she cupped Alicia’s breast in her hand, feeling her nipple hard against her hand. Alicia’s hips lifted off the bed and her moan was louder, longer this time. Zoe smiled. It was going to be quite a lot of work keeping this girl quiet.

Zoe pulled away and sat up. Alicia looked up at her, the question clear on her face. Before it could become rejection, Zoe pulled off her t-shirt, tossing it on the floor. She pulled Alicia into a sitting positon and stripped off her shirt and bra, running her hand down the other woman’s bare back, feeling the goosebumps that popped up under her touch. She kissed Alicia’s neck, her shoulder, feeling her bare skin pressed against hers. She felt Alicia’s lips on her shoulder and gasped as the other woman’s teeth nipped at the muscle she found there. 

With a growl, Zoe pushed Alicia back down on the bed and followed her, kissing her chin, down her neck, her collar bone. Alicia tangled her hand in the other girl’s hair as she reached her breast. Zoe kissed her nipple slowly, giving her a chance to change her mind. When she didn’t, she took the hard nub in her mouth and sucked, hard. Alicia gasped, groaned, she pulled the second pillow off the bed and crammed it in her mouth, yelling into the cloth as Zoe flicked with her tongue, nibbled gently with her teeth. Zoe was glad she’d thought about the pillow because otherwise her yells would have filled the room. 

Zoe switched to the next nipple and had to keep herself from biting down hard when Alicia’s nails dug into the muscles of her back. Zoe took a deep breath to regain control and thought about the amazing, rough sex they could have once Alicia became more comfortable. She moved the pillow away from Alicia’s mouth and moved back up to kiss her lips, darting her tongue gently into Alicia’s mouth. 

She let her hand roam across Alicia’s chest, down to her stomach and finally, into the waistband of her pants. Zoe popped the button on the other girl’s jeans and unzipped them with one hand. She kept her hand there, feeling Alicia’s hips bucking, begging Zoe to touch her. 

“Are you sure?” Zoe asked, pulling away from Alicia’s lips. “There’s no going back after this.”

“I don’t want to go back,” Alicia breathed. “And I want you.”

That was all Zoe needed and she put her lips back on Alicia’s and slid her hand between her legs in a single motion. Alicia gasped into Zoe’s mouth, breaking their kiss and leaning her forehead against Zoe’s shoulder as she groaned and gasped and writhed under her touch. Zoe felt the wetness between her legs, slick on her fingers, and she let out a low, quiet moan that made Alicia feel like she was on fire. She’d never felt that before, knowing that her body could have that effect on someone. 

Zoe found Alicia’s clit quickly, swollen and ready for her touch, and when she gently laid her index finger on it, Alicia gasped and dug her nails hard into Zoe’s back. Zoe trapped Alicia’s lips with hers, knowing that she would need to keep her as quiet as possible or she’d wake up the whole house. Zoe rubbed her clit, gently at first and then faster as Alicia’s breath started coming in quick gasps, her hips grinding against Zoe’s fingers, begging for more. Zoe could feel more wetness slicking her fingers, making her even more excited at the idea that she was having this effect on the beautiful girl beneath her.

“Oh, fuck,” Alicia breathed into Zoe’s mouth and she came, letting out a yell that Zoe tried to muffle and finally settled for Alicia biting into her shoulder as waves crashed over her. 

Finally, Alicia had calmed down. Zoe pulled her fingers out of Alicia’s pants, tempted to taste the wetness but deciding that it might freak Alicia out. Instead, she wiped them on the sheet and pulled Alicia into her arms, the other girl’s head on her chest, holding her tightly while she came down from her high. 

“Holy shit,” Alicia finally breathed when she could speak again. 

Zoe laughed quietly and kissed Alicia on the forehead. “And that’s why I think chick sex is far superior to sex with a guy. Because in taking turns, I got to focus completely on you and your pleasure, on being close to you and meeting your needs. Making you come as hard as possible.”

Alicia giggled and curled her body around Zoe’s, putting her leg across the other girl’s body. “You succeeded at that. It was amazing.”

“I am pretty good,” Zoe smiled, surprised by how happy she was. She could almost forget the apocalypse taking place outside her window. 

“So now, I guess it’s your turn,” Alicia said, sounding a little nervous. 

“That’s lesson number two.”

“When do we start that lesson?”

Zoe laughed. “Aren’t you an eager student? But you’re also a tired student,” Alicia tried to hide her yawn in the pillow and failed. “Tomorrow night, you’re all mine, for the whole night. I’ll teach you everything you want to know and do everything to you that you want me to do.”

“That sounds amazing,” Alicia breathed, already sounding sleepy. 

Zoe pulled her in even closer, tighter against her body and within seconds, Alicia’s breathing was even and she was asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's hoping it was worth the wait and thank you for sticking with me. It will probably be another week or two before I can get any new content out because of the end of the semester and a lot of work to get done.


	6. “When I’d Almost Given Up, You Gave Me Hope.”

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoe and Alicia face the aftermath of their night together and their growing feelings for each other. Zoe is forced to confront growing distrust of her motives, and the women find an unlikely ally.

Zoe could feel the hot sun on her back through the thin white cotton of her tank top. It should have been colder on the roof, her watch telling her that it was just past nine, but there was already a thin sheen of sweat on her arms and face. She’d done a few sets of jumping jacks, some squats, a plank held as long as she could until her arms shook and she dropped to her stomach. Now, she was doing push ups, feeling the ache in her chest and shoulders. 

She’d gotten three hours of sleep, lying there in bed with Alicia’s head on her shoulder, her body pressed against hers. At eight, she’d woken, without any nightmares, without the familiar cold sweat, without screaming her brother’s name. She’d woken Alicia so she could go curl up on the couch in the other apartment and pretend like she’d been asleep there all night. The women parted with a final kiss that Zoe hoped would never end and then she’d climbed up to the roof to work off more extra energy than she’d had in a long time. 

Zoe finished a set of push ups, and rolled onto her back for some sit ups, squinting into the sun. 

“I could get used to this view,” a voice said from behind her. 

Zoe almost jumped until she recognized Alicia’s voice. She turned around with a smile. “What are you doing up here? I thought the whole point of you going to sleep on the couch was so your family would see you and think you’d been there all night.”

“My mom got up to go to the bathroom and saw me. I figure I can just tell her that I woke up and couldn’t get back to sleep.”

“How long have you been standing there?”

“Long enough to know that I want to spend a lot more time watching you do push ups.”

Zoe smiled and walked over to Alicia, giving her a quick kiss on the mouth. As she pulled back, the other woman wrapped her arms around her waist and wouldn’t let her go. 

“Be careful,” Zoe laughed. “I’m all sweaty and I probably stink.”

“I don’t care,” Alicia said and kissed Zoe hard, pulling her in tightly, pressing their bodies together. 

Zoe melted into her arms, into her kiss. She’d never felt like this before. Normally, she was the one in control, the one in charge, the one on top. Now, even though she was older and more experienced than Alicia, she felt safe, like she could let her guard down. For a moment, an image popped into her head of Alicia, hair a little wild, cheeks a little flushed, straddling her hips and grinding against her while she used one hand to keep Zoe pinned to the bed. Zoe kissed her back with renewed force and when they finally parted, both women were out of breath.

“So what are we going to do about tonight?” Zoe asked, dropping to her back on the roof to resume her workout. 

“What do you mean?” Alicia looked confused. 

“Well, I figure that you probably want to sleep with me again, right?”

“Of course,” Alicia grinned.

“So how are we going to make that happen?”

Alicia chewed on her lower lip, contemplating her options. Zoe got through three sets of sit ups and another set of push ups before Alicia gave up, shrugged, and sat down on the roof. Zoe crawled over to her and sat down beside her. 

“We’ll figure something out,” Zoe said, nudging Alicia gently with her shoulder.

“Hey,” a voice called from the window. “You two up there?”

Zoe stood and walked away, dropping in the middle of the roof for a set of push ups. 

“Yeah,” Alicia answered. 

Nick climbed up the ladder, his shaggy brown hair popping over the side of the roof first, followed shortly after by the rest of his body. With a grunt, he pulled himself over the edge of the roof. 

“What are you doing up here? Mom woke everyone up freaking out because you were gone.”

“What, did she think I’d gone out for a morning walk?”

Nick looked sideways at Zoe but he didn’t answer. Zoe pushed herself off the ground and wiped her hands on her sweats. 

“Your mom was worried that I’d done something to you,” Zoe volunteered. “In her defense, she doesn’t know me very well.”

“If you’d wanted me dead, you could have killed me when we got separated from the group and said I’d gotten eaten by walkers.”

Nick shrugged. “She’s overprotective. It’s not like we haven’t been through a lot and we don’t know her very well.”

“If Zoe wanted us dead or hurt, why’d she save us in the first place? Why’d she risk her life going out to save the others or to bring me home last night? Why did she give Travis directions to get back here without her?”

Alicia was becoming more and more upset as she spoke, nearly yelling at Nick by the time she was done. Zoe calmly stepped between them. 

“I don’t blame any of you for not trusting me,” Zoe said. “Especially not your mom. This is a different world we live in and I know what it’s like out there. But, I’d also never hurt any of you. If I’d wanted you dead, I never would have pulled you through my window. I’m just helping you because I wish someone had helped my family along the way and maybe I wouldn’t be the only one left. Now, I’m going to head on in and start on breakfast.”

Zoe started down the ladder and Alicia moved to join her but Nick grabbed her arm to hold her back. 

“We’ll join you in a minute.”

Alicia stood there, arms crossed over her chest, glaring at her brother. 

“What?” she asked finally. 

“What’s going on between you two?”

“None of your business.”

“Really, because when I got up this morning, long before Mom ever did, you weren’t on the couch. You spent the night with her.”

Alicia looked away. “Why does it matter?”

“I don’t know what she said to you or what you think you feel for her, but she’s probably just using you. After all, I’m sure all these lonely nights get cold and you’re just a young, innocent girl.”

Alicia glared at Nick. “I stopped being an innocent girl the first time I watched my big brother OD on the kitchen floor. I’ve made it through this fucked up world so far and I’ll have feelings for whoever the hell I want to. You didn’t give a shit about me when all you cared about was getting high so you’ve lost the right to lecture me about my life choices.”

Nick’s face dropped. He wanted to be mad but she was telling the truth and he didn’t have a defense. He’d made his own bad decisions and stupid choices. 

“I just don’t want you to get hurt,” he muttered weakly.

“There are a lot of ways I could get hurt but I don’t think Zoe’s going to be one of them.”

“What if she’s just using you? She’s probably lonely.”

“I am too,” Alicia cried, throwing her hands up in the air. “But that doesn’t change the way I feel about her. I care about Zoe. And when she holds me, it makes me believe that this world we live in isn’t all bad.”

“You really do like this girl, huh?”

Alicia nodded. 

Nick sighed and shoved his hands in his pockets. Rocking back and forth on his heels, he grimaced into the sunlight. 

“Alright,” he said, finally. “Just be careful.”

“I will be,” Alicia promised. 

Nick followed her down the ladder and helped her put it back on the roof. They locked and barred the window. Everyone else was already there. Chris and Travis were sprawled on the sofa, half-asleep. Ofelia was setting the table, Madison was standing at the counter, and Daniel was sitting at the table, already covered with a plate of bacon and a jug of steaming coffee. It made Alicia’s mouth water. Zoe was bent over the camp stove stirring a pot of eggs. She smiled up at Alicia as she walked over.

“You scared me half to death,” Madison scolded. 

“Did you think I went for a morning walk?”

Madison frowned at her and Alicia shrugged her shoulders. “There are a limited number of places that I could be, Mom,” she said. “Unless you’re suggesting that our host was going to do something to hurt me.”

Zoe turned back to the eggs to hide the smile on her face. Madison pursed her lips at her daughter, a sour look on her face. 

“Of course I didn’t think that,” her voice was crisp as she spoke, carefully controlled with every word. “I am just worried about you.”

“I’m fine,” Alicia said, gesturing to her body with her hands. “Other than that scrape from last night, I’m in one piece.”

Alicia went and sat down at the table with Daniel and Ofelia joined them since she’d finished making the table. 

“I’d like to see your scrape,” Daniel said, leaning on the table with his elbows. “Just in case.”

Alicia glared at him. “You think it’s a bite? I’m going to turn and start trying to nibble at your ankles.”

“Alicia,” Madison scolded. 

Zoe walked over with the pan of eggs and put it on the table. She’d wrapped Alicia’s arm again with a clean bandage this morning, their bedroom activities having made the old one fall off. 

“Go ahead,” Zoe agreed, nodding at Daniel. “He’s just being cautious. I was too when I saw it.”

Alicia agreed. The other woman had been cautious last night when she’d thought that she’d been bit, but it was for a different reason. Alicia could still remember the fear in her voice, on her face, the relief that was evident for a second when she saw that it was just a scrape before their lips met and Alicia forgot how to breathe for a few seconds.

Alicia unwound the bandage and held out her arm so Daniel could see it. It looked much better already, especially now that it was clean. There were a dozen or so thin cuts on her elbow, two or three deep enough that they were still trying to bleed. Daniel touched her arm, moving it back and forth, squinting at it to check for teeth marks. Alicia bit her lip against the ache. The skin around the wound was bruised and tender. Zoe caught Daniel’s wrist in her hand and she met his eyes coldly when he glared up at her. 

“I think you’ve seen enough to prove that she wasn’t bitten.”

Daniel let go of Alicia’s arm and Zoe instantly dropped his wrist. The tension in the room was palpable as Daniel rubbed his wrist and Zoe realized that she’d been gripping it a little harder than she’d intended. She picked up the bandage and walked Alicia over to the sink where a jug of purified water she’d used earlier to make coffee was sitting. She grabbed a clean washcloth out of the drawer and started cleaning Alicia’s arm. 

“Help yourself to some breakfast,” Zoe said, aware that everyone in the room was watching her every move. “Those eggs are nasty enough before they get cold but it’s the best I had on such short notice.”

“Yeah,” Travis stifled a yawn and pushed himself off the couch. “Sorry we interrupted your workout. I figured we’d have slept later.”

“It’s alright,” Zoe nodded. “I’d have been pretty freaked out if the situation were reversed. But I do want to point one thing out. I’m pretty outnumbered here, so I feel like you’re the ones with the upper hand. You all know each other and have been traveling together for at least a little while, I’d guess. So I’m kind of putting myself out there, trusting all of you. I haven’t taken your weapons and I’m not restricting your access to any kinds of supplies. In fact, today I figured we’d go downstairs and you all can grab whatever you want or need.”

“You really seem to be going out of your way to help us,” Daniel said, sliding his eggs around his plate with his fork. 

“I’m not going out of my way,” Zoe carefully wiped off Alicia’s arm, looking up at the woman apologetically when she hissed in pain. “I just happened to stumble across this place because of dumb luck, just like these four did. The truth of the matter is that I will probably die long before all this shit’s gone.”

“So you’re doing this out of the kindness of your heart?” Daniel didn’t seem convinced. 

Zoe turned her attention back to Alicia, caught her eye, and winked. “Something like that.”

“Why don’t you just back off?” Nick suddenly snapped, taking them all by surprise. “She’s helping us and she hasn’t tried to stab any of us in our sleep. You’d be dead if not for her and so would your daughter, so just go with it.”

Alicia’s jaw dropped but she didn’t say anything. Zoe just grinned, making sure she wasn’t looking at anyone so they couldn’t see her expression. 

“What I’m really wondering,” Travis said, “is how you found bacon during the apocalypse.”

“Would you believe me if I said it was canned?” Zoe asked, finishing with bandaging Alicia’s arm.

“Seriously,” Chris shoved another piece in his mouth. “This is really good.”

“Yeah,” Zoe nodded. “There’s all kinds of random stuff downstairs. Like I said, I’ll open it up when we get done eating. I also figure you’d all probably like a shower.”

“Definitely,” Travis nodded. 

“For that, I’ll need your help. We’ll have to go collect water from some of the tanks nearby. Shouldn’t be too difficult. It rained last week so they should be pretty full.”

“How does that work?” Ofelia asked, pouring another cup of coffee.

“Each of the tanks has a spigot at the bottom so it can be emptied. I take a section of hose with me and drain the tanks into the gas cans, then bring them back here. There were a few camp showers in storage and I rigged one of them up over here in one of the bathrooms. I can do the same for both your bathrooms. Then we just fill up the bags and it’s not a half bad shower. I can heat up some water to so it’s a little more comfortable.”

“A hot shower does sound pretty amazing,” Ofelia agreed. 

Everyone finished eating, with Daniel glaring at Zoe across the table and Zoe putting on her kindest smile every time her eyes met his. It was going to take a lot more effort than that to scare her. After breakfast, Alicia, Zoe and Chris washed the dishes while Daniel, Madison, and Ofelia carried up gas cans from a closet on the first floor where they were stored. 

Zoe showed Travis how to lower the gas cans using a rope and Nick and Chris when down to the alley to untie them and line them up against the building next door. Zoe grabbed her backpack and everyone else grabbed their weapons. 

“Shouldn’t take us long, like I said,” Zoe cinched up her backpack straps when she hit the alleyway and had put up the ladder. “All the tanks are within a couple block area. But be careful. With that horde having come through, I don’t know what might be waiting for us.”

Madison and Daniel were staying behind, much to Zoe’s chagrin. She figured they’d go through all her stuff by the time the rest of the group got back, but there wasn’t much stuff and it hadn’t been hers for very long, so she just ignored the thought and lead Travis, Ofelia, Alicia, Chris, and Nick through the streets. The water tanks were big, 50-gallon, plastic barrels that Zoe had attached to the gutters of several buildings. The aluminum gutters crawled down the side of the buildings until about five feet above the ground where Zoe had hacked it off with a saw and, using a piece of flexible black pipe, routed the water into a hole on the top of the barrels. There was a spigot near the bottom of the barrel and Alicia pulled out a length of hose to make it easier to fill the gas cans. 

She knocked lightly on the side of the tank and nodded. “This one’s about half full. There’s another one just down the alley on the corner of that building,” Zoe pointed to a red brick building that had once been a movie theater. “If we can’t fill them all from this one, we won’t have much further to go.”

Between them, they were carrying twelve of the five gallon cans. With all of them needing showers, Zoe thought that they might have to take another run before the evening, but it was just past eleven so they had time. 

Zoe filled up six of the cans and suggested that Travis, Chris, and Ofelia head on back to the safehouse with them, leaving her, Nick, and Alicia to get water from the other tank down the alley. After the other three disappeared towards the safehouse, Zoe grabbed two of the empty cans and took off towards the other building. 

“Anything you want to lecture me about, Nick?” Zoe asked before they’d gone too far, taking both him and Alicia by surprise. 

Nick looked at her out of the corner of her eye, a little impressed. “What do you mean?”

“Any brotherly advice you want to lay on me? Something like, hurt her and I’ll kill you, or a version of it?”

“Why would I need to do that?”

Zoe turned to him, grinning. “Keep playing this game, Nick, and this conversation’s going to get really uncomfortable for you.”

Nick cleared his throat and Alicia tried to hide a smile, failing miserably and catching Zoe’s eye over her brother’s shoulder. 

“I’m worried about your motivation, honestly,” Nick said. “Personally, I think you’re just lonely and that you’re using my sister for some companionship and physical comfort and that you’re going to chew her up and spit her out when you get done with her. I don’t care that you’re a girl. I’d have the same fear if you were a guy.”

“So this isn’t about Alicia being with a woman?”

“I’m not going to lie to you and tell you that I’m not a little surprised. I always thought my sister was straight, personally, but then again, I didn’t really think about it too much, and it’s not any of my business anyway.”

Zoe nodded. “Fair enough. I appreciate your honesty and I don’t blame you for being suspicious. You don’t know me. But I hope you’re at least familiar enough with me and who I am to trust what I’m going to tell you. I’m crazy about your sister. The first time I saw her, I couldn’t take my eyes off her, and even without the impending apocalypse and all the bullshit we’ve all gone through, I’d still be crazy about her. I’ll admit that being out here is lonely as hell, and with anyone else it might have been a casual thing, but first, I’d never sleep with anyone without their consent, and second, it’s different with Alicia.

“I can’t explain it, Nick. At least probably not in a way that would make you trust me, mainly because I can’t figure out what words to use myself because everything I say doesn’t seem close to telling you how I feel about her. So can I just promise you that I won’t hurt her and you take my word for it?”

Nick paused, rubbing his chin with the back of his and thought. Alicia was standing behind him, feeling tears prick her eyes. She’d never really heard anyone talk about her that way, and she knew the feeling. It was the tightness in her chest every time she heard Zoe talk and butterflies in her stomach when she smiled at her and a light-headed tingle every time they kissed. Alicia couldn’t put it into words either, though there was a word she thought it might be but she wasn’t willing to use it yet. 

Nick cleared his throat, nodded. “I believe you.”

Zoe let out a breath, relieved, and turned to start walking again. 

“But Zoe,” Nick stopped her.

“Yeah.”

“Hurt my sister and I’ll kill you.”

“Deal,” Zoe smiled. 

 

Zoe, Alicia, and Nick got back to the safehouse about half an hour later and Travis and Chris helped pull up the jugs of water into the house with the rope. Zoe was the last to climb into the living room and she put up the ladder and locked the window behind her. 

“Alright, a couple more steps and then we’ll be able to shower. I always filter the water from the roof through a colander to remove rocks and debris so it doesn’t clog up the shower head. Then we can heat some of it up if you want to and everyone can start taking showers.”

Zoe pulled a set of keys out of her pocket and handed them to Nick. 

“The apartment on the left downstairs has a couple five gallon buckets and the strainers in there if you want to grab them.”

“While you’re all working on this, I need to talk to Alicia for a minute,” Madison said, walking into the room from the hallway. 

Alicia shrugged and followed her mom into the empty apartment. Daniel had been sitting on the sofa, flipping through a book he’d found, when they’d climbed in. Madison shut the door behind them but that wasn’t private enough and she pulled Alicia into the bedroom she and Travis had shared the night before and shut that door as well. Alicia’s stomach flipped and this time it wasn’t a pleasant feeling. 

“I need to tell you something about your new friend,” Madison started, “and I know you won’t like it but I want you to hear me out.”

Madison pulled something out of her back pocket and Alicia saw that it was her watch. She swore in her head. Her mom had been rooting through Zoe’s room and must have found it on the floor where it had fallen the night before. Alicia had taken it off because it hadn’t been comfortable when they were wrapped in each other’s arms.

“I found this in Zoe’s room. I don’t know when she stole it from you, but I thought you’d want to know.”

“You went through her room,” Alicia snapped, grabbing the watch out of her mother’s hands and strapping it on her wrist. “I can’t believe you’d invade her privacy like that. It was none of your business.”

“You’re more upset with me for going through her things than you are with her for stealing from you? What the hell is going on?”

“She didn’t steal it from me. I left it in her room last night.”

Madison was silenced. She sat down on the bed, brow furrowed in confusion. “I don’t understand.”

“I went back to thank her for saving my life and I ended up staying until about eight this morning. I’d only been on the couch for about forty-five minutes when you went to the bathroom.”

“What were you doing with her?”

Alicia considered telling her the truth, but she knew her mother would never let it rest without a fight, and she didn’t want her to confront Zoe, especially in front of Travis and Daniel, who would probably make it into a bigger deal than it actually was. Instead, she lied. 

“We were just talking. It’s nice to have someone who’s almost my age to talk to again. She told me about her family, about how she got here and how she’s set up the area for resources. She even talked about wanting to plant a garden nearby so she can get some fresh vegetables. I told her about Matt and how we left Los Angeles. We talked about school and friends and how things have changed. I’ve been stuck with you all for the past two months. It’s nice to have someone different to interact with.”

Madison sat still for a few minutes, obviously considering what Alicia had said. “I don’t think I like it. I don’t trust this girl.”

“You keep saying that,” Alicia said. “But you’re not giving a reason why you don’t trust her. You wouldn’t be here without Zoe, and I wouldn’t be here without her risking her life to get me home last night. So leave it alone and unless you have a damn good reason, drop it.”

“You’re going to be friends with her whether I like it or not, huh.”

“Yep,” Alicia nodded. 

“Fine,” Madison stood up. “But I’ve made my opinion known.”

“Yes, Mom, you have. Several times in fact. I don’t need to hear it again.”

Madison looked taken aback, but she didn’t say anything so Alicia opened the door and walked out of the bedroom, across the hallway into the other apartment, to where Zoe was helping Ofelia and Nick strain debris out of the water. She grabbed Zoe by the arm and pulled her into Zoe’s bedroom, everyone else watching curiously until Alicia slammed the door shut behind them and then they went back to what they’d been doing. 

Alicia turned to Zoe, anger evident on her face. She crossed her arms over her chest and paced back and forth in the small room. “My mom went through your stuff while we were gone,” she said, finally. 

Zoe reached out to stop her as she went by, grabbing Alicia’s arm and pulling her close so that the women were only a few inches apart. Zoe could hear Alicia’s breaths leaving her nose in a quick, angry pant. She smiled sadly at the other woman. 

“I kind of figured she would to be honest. I don’t have much in here to hide.”

“She found my watch.”

“Oh,” Zoe said. “What did you say?”

“I thought about telling her about us,” Alicia admitted. “But I chickened out at the last minute.”

“I don’t think you chickened out,” Zoe said, squeezing Alicia’s arms reassuringly. “I think you did what you thought was best. It would be hard for us to spend any time alone with your mom breathing down our necks.”

Alicia was quiet for a moment, eyes downcast. She looked up suddenly, green eyes trapping Zoe’s blue ones in a look that Zoe had never seen before. There was fire and passion and hope and fear and maybe even love. It made Zoe’s knees week and now she wondered if the tight grip she had on Alicia’s arms was for her benefit more than the other woman’s. 

“Did you mean what you told Nick?” Alicia asked, quiet voice betraying the storm of emotions in her eyes. “Or was that just for show so he’d leave you alone?”

Zoe reached up with one hand and tilted Alicia’s chin up so that her lips were inches from hers. She could feel Alicia’s breath on her mouth. “I meant every word of it,” Zoe whispered. “You came into my life when I didn’t know I needed you. When I’d almost given up, you gave me hope. I care about you more than you could imagine, more than I ever thought possible. Ask me a thousand more times and I’ll give you the same answer. I’m falling in love with you, Alicia.”

Zoe’s voice was thick when she said the last part and Alicia was surprised to see tears in the other woman’s eyes, one thick drop rolling down her cheek. When they kissed, Alicia could taste the salt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your patience between updates. I'm done with school for the summer and updates should be more regular now. I'm glad that everyone is enjoying the story and I appreciate your comments and feedback. I'm really having a great time writing this story and exploring this relationship.


	7. “I don’t care what happens, as long as I’m with you.”

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoe and Alicia spend a night together, thinking about the future, wondering about the past, and welcoming the present.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a light, fluffy little chapter for your entertainment as a "thank you" for sticking with me. I think I've decided where I want this story to go and there will be a lot more plot development and a little less fluff after the next couple chapters. Right now, I'm shooting for this story to be about 12-14 chapters long, but depending on the response, it could be a lot longer than that.

Chapter 7: “I don’t care what happens, as long as I’m with you.”

It had been three more nights that they’d spent together. That first, clumsy night dissolved as they became more comfortable with each other, with the touch of their skin and the taste of their lips and the feel of their bodies. Alicia sat naked in Zoe’s lap, her legs wrapped around the other woman’s waist. Zoe’s hand was between the other woman’s legs, fingers inside her, feeling the wet, slickness cover her fingers, her palm, to her wrist. They were sweating in the dark room, bodies moving together. Alicia’s head was bent down, hair falling over her face, breath coming in quick gasps and grunts as she tried to stay quiet, getting closer and closer to the edge.

She pulled Zoe’s head towards her chest and Zoe obliged, taking her nipple between her lips and sucking hard. It was enough to drive Alicia crazy and she dug her nails into Zoe’s back, raking red lines in her flesh. She threw back her head and gritted her teeth, trying to keep quiet as she came, eyes tightly shut while she rode Zoe’s fingers to waves of pleasure. She finally collapsed into Zoe’s arms, spent, weak. The other woman held her easily in her strong arms, their sweat mixing as they both caught their breath. Zoe kept her fingers in Alicia, never wanting to move them again. It felt so good. 

“You can pull out if you want to,” Alicia mumbled into Zoe’s neck. 

Zoe grinned into the darkness even though Alicia couldn’t see her face. “I don’t ever want to.”

“I’m just fine with that.”

Zoe’s grin widened. She shifted the other woman off her lap, slowly pulling her fingers out. This time, she raised them to her lips, tasting the sweet, slightly tangy juice that coated her hand. Alicia watched her in the darkness, eyes shining with lust and want and need. She leaned up and kissed Zoe, tasting herself on the other girl’s lips, in her mouth. Alicia groaned. She had tried oral sex the night before. Alicia loved it when Zoe did it to her, experiencing some of the most powerful orgasms she’d ever had, but she was afraid that she wasn’t good at it and had been too self-conscious to be uninhibited and let loose as much as she wanted. 

Tonight, though, she felt bold. She mustered all her strength and pushed against Zoe, whose body was like a brick wall of muscle until she yielded to Alicia’s touch and let the other woman push her onto her back. Alicia kissed her neck, her collar bone, down to each nipple which she flicked generously with her tongue. When she moved down to Zoe’s stomach, she felt hands on either side of her face pulling her back up. She raised her head, a look of confusion on her face. 

“Are you sure you want to?” Zoe asked. “I know you weren’t very comfortable last night and I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to do.”

Alicia smiled at her and the effect was enough to take Zoe’s breath away, a look that was sexy and dangerous and confident and daring, but also sweet and loving. Zoe didn’t know how she did it. 

“I’m sure,” Alicia said. “Now shut up, lie back, and let me eat you out.”

Zoe smiled and did as she said, resting her head back on the pillow and staring up at the dark ceiling. She felt Alicia’s head between her legs and there was a warm glow of anticipation resting in her stomach. She felt the first, hesitant lick on her clit, warm and soft, and reached down with one hand, tangling it in Alicia’s hear.

Before long, it was everything Zoe could do not to yell into the darkness. She reached out and picked up the second pillow from the floor where it had fallen earlier and put it over her face, biting into the fabric as Alicia lavished a few harder, long licks, up and down, that made Zoe buck her hips and pull Alicia’s face in deeper. Alicia pulled away for a second, only long enough to slip a finger in Zoe, and the other woman knew she wouldn’t last long. She’d been right, but she thought she had a couple more minutes in her. Alicia had other ideas. She pulled Zoe’s clit into her mouth, sucking on it hard enough that it played with the tenuous relationship between pleasure and pain. Zoe came, hard, biting the pillow and pulling Alicia’s head harder against her with both hands this time. It took a while before she came back down to earth and felt safe enough to push the pillow away.

She saw Alicia between her legs, grinning, wiping Zoe’s juices off her face with the back of her hand. Zoe laid back with a sigh. 

“Holy shit,” was all she could find to say. 

Alicia laughed and made her way back up the bed, kissing Zoe so she could get the same experience of tasting herself on the other woman’s mouth. Zoe kissed her so hard that it almost made Alicia want to start again. 

They’d barely been able to keep their hands off each other the past few days. The first day, after they’d showered and Zoe had taken everyone downstairs for new clothes and supplies, they’d made love with Alicia sitting on the edge of the bed and Zoe’s head between her legs when she was supposed to be picking out a board game for everyone to play. It had only taken a few minutes for Alicia to grip the back of Zoe’s head and grind herself against the other woman’s face. They’d walked out a few minutes later with Monopoly and the urge to make the game quick.

That night, Nick had actually argued for Alicia to stay in one of the spare bedrooms in the apartment with Zoe so no one had to sleep on the sofa. Travis and Chris both agreed and Madison made her displeasure obvious but decided not to argue. Zoe flashed Nick a look of gratitude and he nodded back at her. So that night, they’d spent hours, slowly exploring each other’s bodies, inch by inch. Zoe made Alicia come until she could barely keep her eyes open. In the darkness of the room, Alicia had traced Zoe’s tattoo on her back, looking at the image in the pale moonlight filtering in through the window. 

“It’s beautiful,” she’d breathed. 

Zoe smiled. She’d started it on her 18th birthday, a present from her older brother who took her to the same place he’d gotten his back piece. It had taken a little over forty hours in the chair and several months waiting for it to heal before she could go back and get more done, but finally, it had been done. It covered her whole back and looked like a Renaissance painting. There was a forest, shaded with fog and shadows. In the center of the piece, standing on mossy, green ground, a knight knelt in front of a beautiful woman. The woman was wearing a long, blue dress, her brown hair flowing down her back, her hand outstretched towards the knight. The knight was looking up at the woman, her face tilted up with awe and radiance clear on her face. Her helmet was off, just sitting in front of her bent leg, blonde hair braided and draping over one shoulder of her armor. At the time, she’d considered herself the knight and now, with Alicia’s warm fingers running across her back, she’d felt the same way. 

Her half-sleeves on both arms worked their way in with the same theme. The left arm was a piece of armor looking like it was growing out of her skin, embossed with a Celtic knot similar to the one on her cuff tattoo. The right arm was a rearing charger, the horse high on its back legs, kicking out with the front, steam pouring from its nose. Alicia had spent a lot of time since then kissing the ink on her body every chance she could get. 

After breakfast the next day, Alicia had pulled Zoe into the bedroom, pushed her up against the wall, and fingered her until she came, never saying a word and kissing away anything that Zoe had to say. That night Zoe had talked Alicia though the process of eating her out, trying to make it sound sexy, but Alicia had been nervous and hesitant. That was gone tonight, and Zoe was happy about that. She was still panting into the darkness even after Alicia pulled away from their kiss. 

“I wish we could get some time alone. Real time, where we don’t have to be quiet,” Alicia voiced the same thoughts that Zoe was having. 

Zoe nodded, leaned over, kissed her forehead. It’s not like they were getting much sleep anyway. Alicia would start in her room while everyone wasted time in the living room, reading books or playing games. Then, when everyone was gone, she’d sneak over to Zoe’s room and they’d spend as much time as possible making love, not wasting any time when she hit the door to get their clothes off and their hands on each other. Then, shortly before the sun rose, Alicia would go back to her room and Zoe would try to get an hour or two of sleep alone, noticing that when Alicia wasn’t with her, the nightmares were back, but they weren’t as bad as they had been. She’d relish a night where they could sleep together, really sleep, and Zoe could wake up with Alicia in her arms. 

“Maybe someday we’ll get to.”

“There are other buildings, other apartments, on the street. Could we use one of those?”

Zoe thought for a moment. “Yeah, we could. I cleaned out the whole block pretty early on. Most of it was already deserted but when I was collecting supplies, I figure it was safer to just give myself a little safe zone.”

“So let’s do that,” Alicia suggested. 

“What are we going to tell everyone else? Your mom’s barely letting you sleep in the same general area as me. What would she do if you said you wanted to wander off for a couple days with me?”

“Maybe I should tell her the truth.”

“That’s up to you,” Zoe said. “You know her better than I do.”

“I don’t really feel like I know her at all. So much has gone on,” Alicia shrugged. “Let me think about it and maybe I can come up with something.”

Zoe stretched in the bed, pushing her hands against the wall and feeling her muscles tighten. She relaxed with a satisfied sigh. “It’s almost five,” Zoe said. 

“Maybe we should just forget about me going back to the other room. That’d be a hell of a way to tell everyone.”

“I certainly wouldn’t mind it. I could actually get some sleep that way.”

“Still having nightmares?”

Zoe nodded. She didn’t like to talk about it. She felt like it made her weak and she was supposed to be the strong one. But Alicia had asked about it, after the night they’d spent hunkered down in the classroom and Zoe had almost taken her head off. Zoe had been honest with her. She’d told her about the weeks of barely sleeping, the nightmares that made her sick or made her scream, or both. She’d even started to shake as she spoke but this time, Alicia was there to hold her, just like she was now. She nestled into Zoe, her head lying on the other woman’s chest. 

“Then fuck it,” she said. “I’m staying here. You need sleep tonight and you’re going to get it. I need you rested for when we finally get to spend some time alone.”

“Yes ma’am,” Zoe smiled. “But are you sure you want to do this. Your mom’s going to be pissed.”

“I don’t care what happens, as long as I’m with you,” Alicia said, her voice little more than a sleepy whisper. 

Zoe kissed the top of her head and felt her eyes sliding closed against the darkness.


	8. "I Wouldn't Do That if I Were You."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alicia and Zoe face the consequences of their relationship and decide that a change of scenery might be just what they need.

Chapter 8: “I Wouldn’t Do That if I Were You.”

                Zoe woke to the sound of yelling outside her bedroom door. The sun was up and a quick look at her watch showed that it was after nine. She’d slept later than she had since the outbreak, but judging by the sounds outside, that hadn’t been a good idea. She pushed the covers off, realizing that Alicia was gone and wondering how long she’d been alone. She quickly pulled on a pair of jeans and a tank top before throwing open the door.

               Madison and Alicia were in the middle of the room, screaming so loudly at each other that Zoe couldn’t hear what either of them were saying. Chris and Nick were sitting on the couch, looking at both of them with open mouths and surprised looks on their faces. Ofelia and Daniel had obviously left since neither of them were anywhere to be found, probably in the apartment across the hall trying to stay out of the line of fire. Travis was dancing around the edge of the fray, trying to decide if he should be involved or not. Zoe gave it a few seconds, then she grabbed the handle of a frying pan sitting nearby and brought it down on the edge of the countertop with a horrific bang. The room silenced instantly.

                “Who wants to go first?” Zoe asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

               Madison turned to her and swallowed. Zoe knew she looked intimidating, tattoos standing out on her skin, arms corded with muscle, a wide stance and a dent in the countertop behind her. Alicia was looking at her too but she had a different expression on her face.

                “Is it true?” Madison croaked, voice hoarse from yelling. “Are you sleeping with my daughter?”

                Zoe hesitated, glancing at Alicia over Madison’s shoulder. The young woman nodded.

                “Yes.”

                Madison took a step towards her, raising her hand threateningly. Zoe wasn’t backing down and she stepped forward too, only she bridged the gap between them in three quick strides and stopped inches from Madison’s face.

                “I’d advise you to change your plan, whatever it might be. I’ve done you a kindness by opening my home to you and your family. Don’t make me regret that decision and change my mind. And don’t think that I won’t defend myself.”

                Madison put her hand down and Zoe took a few steps backwards.

                “Very good,” she said. “Now let’s try that again. What’s the problem?”

                “The fact that you’re sleeping with my daughter,” Madison growled, gesturing toward Alicia who was standing behind her, a look of curiosity on her face.

                “I’m still having trouble figuring out what the problem is,” Zoe said, crossing her arms over her chest again.

                “Why?” Madison choked out. “Why are you sleeping with her?”

                “Because I’m head over heels for her,” Zoe said, smiling at Alicia. “Who wouldn’t be? She’s amazing and intelligent and beautiful and a total badass.”

                “Bullshit,” Madison spat. “What’s your game, huh? What are you getting out of this?”

                Zoe cocked her head to the side, a crooked smile quirking her lips. “I don’t really think it’s appropriate for me to tell you what I’m getting out of this. I also don’t think it’s any of your business. You and I aren’t dating, Madison. So I don’t have to ask for your permission and we don’t have to justify anything to you.”

                “She’s my daughter,” Madison cried.

                “She’s also a grown woman who can make decisions for herself,” Zoe yelled back.

                “She’s still a kid.”

                “I stopped being a kid a hell of a long time ago,” Alicia growled from where she stood behind her mother.

                She stepped around the woman to stand next to Zoe, glaring at Madison with fire in her bright green eyes.

                “I stopped being a kid when my dad died, when you left me alone with the neighbor for three days when you went to hunt down Nick after his friend bailed him out of jail, the first time I saw him OD in the kitchen, and then the bathroom, and the living room, and the back of the car. I grew up when you forgot about me for a few years because you were too busy picking up the pieces of your loss, and then Nick’s screw ups, and then when you decided to come back, I didn’t need you anymore, but I let you take back over that role because I knew it was so important to you. Now, I’ve grown up in a world gone to hell and I’m surviving and I’m helping and I’m learning and I’m part of the family and part of the team. But I’m not your little girl anymore and I haven’t been for a long time.”

               Madison seemed shocked. She didn’t know what to say, so she stood there in silence, breathing heavily in a room that was too quiet and where the air was too thick.

               “I’m not going to have this,” she finally said, voice choked with emotion. “Whatever it is, it’s going to stop and it’s going to stop now. Alicia, you’ll move your things back to the other apartment and we’ll start making plans to leave. We’ll be gone in a few days.”

               “Madison,” Travis said, walking over to his girlfriend and placing a calming hand on her shoulder. “Please, we’re safe here, safer than we’ve been in a long time.”

               Madison shrugged him off. “Safe?” she laughed mirthlessly. “We’re not safe with this predator here going after my daughter. I knew I was right about you. I knew something felt off and I should have listened to my gut.”

               “Madison,” Travis said again, stronger this time. “You need to stop.”

               “I haven’t even started yet. She took advantage of my daughter. She’s no better than the monsters out there. No wonder she’s here alone. She probably killed her own family.”

               The smack sent Madison’s head jerking backwards with its force. The second blow landed on her temple, a backhand with enough force behind it to drive Madison to the ground. Zoe wrapped her arms around Alicia to stop the other woman’s blows. Alicia struggled for a moment but she finally stopped and allowed Zoe to pull her back a few steps and push her into the bedroom. Zoe shut the door behind her and turn around to where Madison was kneeling on the ground, looking at blood-stained fingertips from the gash on her lip.

               “My mother was ripped out of my arms by a walker when we were trying to get out of Las Vegas. I left my father in a camp on the side of the road after he beat the shit out of my little brother and lost his mind because of the stress. My brother was killed by a couple walkers at a farmhouse a few miles out of town while I was on a supply run and I had to end his misery with my own hands. Before that, my older brother never came back from the desert after four years in the Marines. That’s why I’m here alone. Because everyone I love has been taken from me. Understand that what you just did, what you said, lost you your daughter.

               “Maybe not for good, but definitely for a while. And understand that it wasn’t walkers or war or some fucked up asshole with a gun. It was you, with judgment and undermining all of the things that make your daughter incredible and special, the things that have kept her alive for this long. You’re welcome to stay as long as you’d like. I’m not going to put you out to the walkers, even with your behavior and the things you said, but keep your distance and I don’t want to hear you say another word to Alicia against me or I can become the person you think I am. You don’t have to like me but for now, you have to live with me.”

               Zoe turned and walked into the bedroom. Before she shut the door, she heard Nick let out a low whistle from the couch.

               “You really screwed shit up, didn’t you, Mom?”

               Alicia was sitting on the bed, head buried in her hands, sobbing. Zoe crossed the room to her, wrapping her up in her arms, pulling her into her lap. She let Alicia rest her head on her shoulder, tears making her neck damp, and let the young woman cry as long as she needed to. It was a while before Alicia’s sobs quieted, the tears dried up. Zoe kissed her forehead, gently pushed a lock of brown hair behind her ear.

               “What can I do to help?” Zoe asked.

               Alicia just shook her head. “I really don’t know.”

               “Why don’t we get out of here for a couple days,” Zoe suggested. There’s a house just outside of town that I cleared out a couple weeks ago and locked back up. I bet it’s still good to go.”

               “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

               “It’ll give your mom a little time to cool down, a little time for Nick and Travis to talk to her. I’ll give Ofelia the keys and we can pack up some supplies. You need a break and maybe I can take your mind off things,” Zoe gently kissed Alicia’s neck, her lips brushing gently over her throat and making the other woman tighten her grip on Zoe’s arm.

               “How can I refuse an offer like that?” Alicia teased.

               Zoe pulled her mouth away from Alicia’s skin and smiled at her. “I’m hoping that you won’t, actually. But if you want to stay here, I’ll understand.”

               “I don’t want to stay here,” Alicia said. “It’d just be days of awkward silences and glares and underhanded comments and I can’t handle that. Can I stay in here while you get everything ready?”

               Zoe nodded and grabbed her backpack off the floor. When she left the bedroom, Travis, Nick, and Ofelia were the only ones left in the living room. Zoe considered that a piece of good luck.

               “I’m sorry about Madison,” Travis said, breaking the silence as soon as the door was shut behind her. “She can be a little intense sometimes. And a little unreasonable.”

               “She cares about her daughter,” Zoe said. “I can appreciate that because I care about her too. I just don’t necessarily agree with her methods or approach.”

               “So can I assume that we’ve about worn out our welcome?” Nick asked, leaning his chin on the back of the couch where he was sitting.

               Zoe shook her head. “No, you haven’t. I don’t hold her feelings against you.” She turned to Travis. “Do you still have that map I gave you?”

               Travis went into the other apartment to grab it and Zoe spread it out on the kitchen table.

               “Alicia and I are going to leave for a few days. There’s a house, here,” Zoe circled the location in red ink. “It’s only a couple miles from here and I cleared it out and locked it up a few weeks ago. I think it’s best if we made ourselves scarce for a little while.”

               “That’s going to piss mom off,” Nick grinned.

               “Frankly, I don’t really care a lot about your mother’s emotional well-being at the moment,” Zoe snapped. She looked up at Travis. “Sorry, that was mean of me.”

               “Can’t say I blame you.”

               “I’m going to go grab some supplies. Ofelia, you get the keys to the supply rooms and the window grate until we get back. There are a ton of MREs down there if you guys don’t want to use the camp stove, but if you do, there are fuel canisters as well. I’m going to run down and grab some stuff for us and then we’ll take off.”

               “Are you sure this is a good idea?” Travis asked.

               “It’s what Alicia needs, honestly. And I’ll take care of her. I know this city like the back of my hand and I won’t put her at risk.”

               “Just be careful,” Travis warned.

               “I’ll go down with you,” Ofelia volunteered as Zoe left the living room. “I should probably know where stuff is.”

               Zoe walked down the stairs with Ofelia following her and opened one of the apartments. She filled the backpack with some food, toiletries, a water filter, some other odds and ends. Ofelia scanned all the shelves while Zoe packed.

               “You know I could just take all this while you’re gone, right?”

               Zoe snorted a laugh. “Let me know how moving a thousand pounds of food, hundreds of gallons of water, a couple hundred sets of clothes, sleeping bags, towels, hundreds of toiletries and flashlights, a couple hundred boxes of candles, and enough other supplies to fill a tractor trailer, works for you. We’d probably make it back here by the time you cleared out a single room. Besides, you might as well just stay here. You can use as much stuff as you’d like and have a safe place to keep it.”

               “Good point.”

               “Occasionally I have those.”

               “I’m not going to steal anything, I promise,” Ofelia said, meeting Zoe’s gaze.

               “I believe you, and I trust you. But if you need anything, take it.”

               “You really love her, don’t you?” Ofelia asked after a pause.

               Zoe stood up and shouldered the backpack. “More than I ever thought possible.”

               “I’m happy for her,” Ofelia nodded. “She deserves someone. Alicia’s a good person and she’s constantly looking out for others. I’m glad there’s someone looking out for her.”

               Zoe felt a warmth in her stomach, those words meaning more to her than Ofelia would ever know. She smiled at the other woman and they walked back upstairs together. Zoe handed the keys to her, then went back into the bedroom to get Alicia. Alicia had packed a bag with some clothes, a few books, and was strapping her machete to her belt when Zoe walked in.

               “Ready?” Zoe asked.

               Alicia nodded and Zoe grabbed her hatchet and gun and flashed a smile at Alicia. “Let’s get the hell out of here.”

 

 

\------------------------------

 

                Zoe and Alicia were able to cross town quickly. It was bright outside, there was a cool wind blowing through the streets, and Zoe was able to see far in front of them as they walked. The few walkers they came across, they were able to take side routes and leave them alone. The house where Zoe was taking them was in the back of a neighborhood at the end of a long street. They walked past large houses, some with the doors and windows boarded up. A few with red Xs on the front.

                “What are those?” Alicia mused.

                “I think there was a large military presence here,” Zoe said as they kept walking. “Like I said, the city was pretty well cleared out when I got here, but a lot of the houses are boarded up and the X means that there are walkers inside. There are green check marks on the doors of houses that are clear. It’s made the scavenging process pretty easy for me, actually. Like the work’s already been done. I learned what it meant the hard way, though. Had a pretty hairy encounter at an apartment close to the safe house.”

                “That was pretty lucky,” Alicia said. “I wonder why it was so empty around here.”

                “I’ve actually done some thinking about that,” Zoe volunteered. “It’s pretty morbid, though.”

                “Most shit is now.”

                “Fair enough,” Zoe agreed. “I’d heard that they bombed most of the major cities on the west and east coasts, to try to keep this thing from spreading. My guess is that the military came in and put the town under martial law and there was either an outbreak in the containment zone or the military put everyone down before they left. Just west of here is a military camp and a lot of dead bodies, not walkers, just bodies. I’ve never been close enough to see how they died.”

                “That is morbid.”

                Zoe shrugged and bumped Alicia gently with her shoulder as they walked. “You’re the one that asked for it.”

                Alicia smiled and placed her hand in Zoe’s, entwining their fingers as they walked. Zoe grinned at the absurdity of the situation, walking hand-in-hand with a beautiful woman down the middle of a street, flanked on either side by red X’d houses. At the end of the street was a small, gated community. Inside, a series of two-story patio homes, almost identical, and all hidden behind tall brick walls. Zoe went to a specific gate and unlocked the padlock with a key she pulled out of her pocket.

                “How do you keep all these keys straight?” Alicia asked as Zoe pulled the gate open.

                Zoe smiled and showed Alicia the key. There was a bold number “4” written in black marker on it.

                Zoe locked the gate behind them and eased the hatchet out of her belt. They surveyed the small yard first. Zoe checked all the windows and the front and back doors. They all seemed to be intact.

                “Did you take the boards off the house?” Alicia asked.

                Zoe nodded. “When I first got here, I felt really safe in a house with boarded up doors and windows. But then, when I was exploring in this area a few weeks ago, I came across this neighborhood, all green check marks, and I decided that I wanted a backup plan, maybe something with a window I could look out. Not somewhere to stay permanently, but like a vacation house. I kept the curtains up so we can cover up all the windows at night so no one will see any light, and it’s fairly safe from walkers with the wall and gate, but I needed somewhere where I didn’t feel quite as trapped.”

                Zoe unlocked another padlock on the front door and stepped inside. She and Alicia checked both floors. The house had a slightly stale smell, felt a little unused, but was deserted. Zoe locked the front door and lead Alicia up to the second floor and the master bedroom. Alicia set her backpack down on the floor and started to take off her t-shirt. Zoe walked over to her and held her hands to stop her.

                “I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” Zoe smiled.

                “Why not?” Alicia looked at her curiously.

                “Because, I’m going to find out exactly how well you’ve paid attention to everything I’ve taught you in the past few days. I have a plan, and I think you’re going to like it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter should be out in a couple days. It will be mostly fluff because after that chapter I'm going to ramp up the action and tension again and I think you're really going to like it. Thank you all for the feedback and comments. I really am happy that you all are enjoying the story.


	9. "How Do You Have Any Energy Left?"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoe and Alicia enjoy a break from the apocalypse and each other's company in the process.

Chapter 9: “How Do You Have Any Energy Left?”  
The master bedroom in the house had a king-sized four poster bed, a long dresser on one wall, a chest of drawers with a flat screen TV across from the bed. There was a walk-in closet on the wall across from the dresser and a bathroom door next to that. Zoe swiped her arm across the dresser, creating space as perfume bottles and a hairbrush and a few receipts fell to the floor. She lifted Alicia onto the dresser, the other woman wrapping her legs around Zoe’s hips. They were still dressed from the waist down. Zoe’s shirt and bra had been discarded somewhere behind them, Alicia’s t-shirt had been tossed as they crawled across the bed. Zoe reached and unhooked Alicia’s bra with one hand, stripped it quickly off her shoulders, tossed it to the side. 

They kissed, hard, until both of them were out of breath. Alicia dug her fingernails into the inked skin of Zoe’s back until she hissed in pain, back arching so that Alicia kissed Zoe’s collarbone and bit into the soft skin of her shoulder. Zoe fumbled with the button on Alicia’s pants, succeeded in undoing it, unzipping her jeans, lifting her off the dresser so she could pull them down. In another few moments, both of them were naked and Zoe felt the warm skin of Alicia’s thighs around her waist. 

Zoe pushed her back with a hand on her chest, pressing Alicia against the wall. She kissed down her chest, to both breasts, gently sucking each nipped into her mouth and flicking it with her tongue until Alicia moaned and tangled her hand in Zoe’s hair. Zoe stood back up, kissed Alicia hard on the mouth, and when she pulled away she saw emerald green eyes looking at her in a way she’d never seen before. 

“I love you,” Zoe breathed, wrapping her hand around the back of Alicia’s head and pulling her close so that their foreheads touched.

Alicia’s hand tightened in her hair and when she spoke, her voice was thick with emotion. “I love you, Zoe,” Alicia pulled the other woman’s head back so that she could look her in the eyes. “Now fuck me.”

Zoe grinned and continued her kisses, down Alicia’s stomach, kissing each thigh before pulling her to the edge of the dresser to allow her better access. Alicia gasped and for a moment she forgot that she could be as loud as she wanted to be. She bit down on her lower lip and then remembered and let out a loud moan. Zoe started with her tongue, added a finger, then another one. It didn’t take long for Alicia to come with a yell that would have woken up neighbors if they had any. 

Zoe stood up and Alicia automatically wrapped her legs around the other woman’s waist. Alicia opened her mouth to say something but Zoe silenced her with a kiss, then picked her up off the dresser and carried her to the bed. They collapsed together on the sheets in a pile of giggles and reaching fingers and kissing lips. Zoe felt Alicia’s hands running over her body and she wasn’t sure how long she was going to be able to stay in control. Zoe knelt between Alicia’s legs and pulled her closer to her, wrapping Alicia’s legs around her waist. She ground her hips against the other woman and was rewarded with a sharp intake of breath.

“You’re a little wild when there’s no one to hear us,” Alicia commented. 

“I can’t even tell you the things I’ve wanted to do to you since we started sleeping together but I couldn’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because there’s no way you could stay in control,” Zoe teased. “I’m just that good.”

“Really?” Alicia smiled. “That sounds like a challenge.”

“Deal,” Zoe agreed. “If you can keep from making any loud noises, I’ll do whatever you want me to. But if you lose it, when you lose it, you have to do whatever I want.”

“This sounds like a win-win situation for me,” Alicia grinned. 

Zoe smiled, laying down so that her body was pressed against Alicia’s, her thigh pressed between Alicia’s legs, gently rubbing in just the right spot each time she moved her body. 

“I can be very mean when it’s in my favor.”

“I guess we’re going to find out,” Alicia said. 

Zoe bent her head down and kissed her hard. Zoe took full advantage of the fact that they were alone, with no one for miles around to hear them. She knew all the right spots to kiss, to touch, to lick. Zoe had to hand it to her, Alicia had a hell of a lot of control. It took several minutes for Zoe to get her panting, then squirming under her touch. Zoe licked at the soft skin of her neck and decided she’d had enough. She wrapped Alicia’s legs around her hips and picked her up, sitting her on the pillows so that her back was against the headboard. Alicia reached above her with both hands and held onto the wooden headboard behind her. 

Zoe grinned, trailing a hand slowly up the inside of her thigh. “I give you forty-five seconds before you start to scream,” she said, a low growl in her throat.

Alicia swallowed hard.

It only took thirty seconds. Alicia yelled loudly enough to wake the dead, which was a little ironic, Zoe though morbidly. In the hours that followed, it was a rare moment that one of them wasn’t making noise, digging their fingernails into the other’s back, biting skin, pulling hair, pushing someone against the headboard or a wall or finally, when they made it out of the bedroom and all the way down the stairs, against a kitchen counter or table, against the sofa, pressed up against a bookcase in the living room. There was a desk in a study that Alicia cleared with a swipe of her arm, then they made use of the comfortable, high-backed leather desk chair. 

It was almost dark outside when they collapsed in a sweaty heap of tangled limbs in the middle of the living room floor. They looked like they’d been in a battle. Alicia had a bruise across her back from a bookshelf, red scratch marks down both arms, a deep, purple bruise on her collar bone where Zoe had sucked just a little too hard, and teeth marks in her shoulder. Zoe had a small line of blood running down her back from where Alicia had dug in just a little too hard, a carpet burn on her right knee, a scrape on her knuckles where she hit the edge of the kitchen counter. 

“Holy shit,” Zoe breathed, putting her hand on her chest and feeling her heart pounding. “That was a workout.”

“Hopefully a good one,” Alicia said, also breathless.

Zoe pushed herself up on her elbows so she could look at the other woman. “Amazing. Best I’ve ever had, actually.”

“So what do we do now?” Alicia asked. 

Zoe chuckled at the young woman and pushed herself forward, planting a kiss on Alicia’s forehead. “I need to drink a gallon of water and sleep for a few days, personally.”

“That sounds amazing.”

“Then come on,” Zoe stood.

She helped Alicia to her feet and the two women scurried back upstairs. They pulled back on clothes. Alicia stuck with a white t-shirt and underwear, which kept Zoe very distracted. Zoe pulled on a pair of sweatpants and decided it was too hot for anything else. She opened the walk-in closet and pulled out a five-gallon gas can of water. Alicia laughed. 

“I should have known you’d be prepared.”

Zoe smiled. “I don’t like to be caught off guard. Besides, like I said, I considered moving out here for a while. I have some water, a small supply of food but it’s all freeze dried, there’s a shotgun hidden under the mattress,” she gestured to the bed. “I figured this could also be a good location to fall back to if I ever lost the safe house.”

“Makes sense,” Alicia sighed and laid back on the bed. 

Zoe filtered some of the water into a hard plastic bottle she’d brought. She also pulled out a couple emergency ration bars. She was way too tired to cook right now and they tasted a little like lemon sugar cookies so they weren’t too bad. She sat cross-legged on the bed next to Alicia and they ate and drank in comfortable silence while night fell around them. 

With the last remaining slivers of sunlight, Zoe checked to make sure the blinds were closed. She pulled the curtains shut and then lit a pair of candles on the bedside tables. They cast enough of a glow around the room that Zoe could see to put everything away after she’d refilled the water bottle. She pulled on a t-shirt and climbed back into bed, burrowing down into the covers next to Alicia. It was getting cold at night and cooler during the day. It had passed into fall and soon it would be winter, though winter here was never as bad as it had been at home. It was still going to get chilly. Not that Zoe minded. She could make it through a hundred winters with Alicia curled up next to her.

Alicia moved closer, wrapping one arm around Zoe’s waist and sleepily nuzzling her neck. 

“Does it feel weird to you, to think about everything in survival mode?”

“Maybe a little,” Zoe said, watching the candles make shadows dance across the ceiling. “But I was homeless for a little while, remember? This isn’t the first time I’ve been in survival mode. Maybe not on this large a scale, but still.”

Alicia sighed. “I was supposed to be going to college, getting away from home and all the bullshit that came with it.”

“Well, you kind of did,” Zoe smiled. 

\----------------  
The next morning, Zoe had breakfast ready by the time Alicia sleepily climbed out of bed and down to the kitchen. Somehow, Zoe had managed to make pancakes on a small camping stove and a little skillet she’d packed in her backpack. Alicia smiled at the other woman, pulled herself up onto a bar stool, and waited until Zoe finished cooking her food before they started eating. 

“How are you feeling this morning?”

Alicia rolled her shoulders gently. “Sore,” she smiled. 

Zoe laughed. “Well, things did get a little wild yesterday. But that wasn’t really what I was talking about.”

“I feel relaxed,” Alicia sighed. “At peace, really. It almost feels weird.”

“Just enjoy it for a little while instead of just waiting for it to end. We’re safe here for now and when we go back to the safe house, we’ll decide what to do next. Let’s just have fun for a while.”

They ate the rest of their breakfast in a peaceful, comfortable silence. Zoe cleaned up the dishes, rinsing them in the shallow water she’d put in the sink and letting them dry in the empty dish drainer on the counter nearby. Zoe leaned her elbows against the kitchen counter. 

“So what do you want to do now?”

“How about a little more of what we did yesterday?”

Zoe laughed and walked around the counter, over to Alicia. “How do you have any energy left?”

“You,” Alicia grinned, wrapping her hand behind Zoe’s neck and pulling her close. “I’ll always have energy for you.”

Zoe could feel Alicia’s breath on her lips, her fingers tangled in her hair, a hand gently making its way up her stomach beneath her t-shirt. Zoe shivered at the touch. She leaned forward, kissing her hard and lifting her off the bar stool. “I’m willing to bet that I can wear you out.”

“I’ll take you up on that challenge.”

Alicia laughed as Zoe carried her upstairs to the bedroom and tossed her gently onto the bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the delay between chapters. I had a medical issue and due to an allergic reaction, I couldn't see out of one eye. Needless to say, that made typing difficult. But, I'm back in business and should have the next chapter out soon. Hope you enjoyed this one!


	10. "I Hope You Understand What Kind of Mistake You Just Made."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alicia and Zoe are forced to face the challenges of having a relationship in the world they live in. Three years later, fate has a different idea.

Chapter 10: “I Hope You Understand What Kind of Mistake You Just Made.”

Alicia could tell that something was wrong. She climbed up the ladder through the window of the safe house and saw Madison and Travis. Her mother’s arms were wrapped around her body, hugging herself. Alicia’s heart felt like it dropped out of her chest.

“What’s wrong?” Alicia asked, dropping her backpack to the ground. “Where’s everyone else? Nick? Is everyone OK?”

“Everyone’s fine, Alicia. We just need to talk.”

Zoe climbed in the window after her. She took a quick look at the scene, silently threw the ladder back up to the roof, then walked over to Alicia, placing a reassuring hand on her back. 

“Do you want me to leave?” Zoe asked. 

Alicia shook her head. “Whatever they need to say, they can do it in front of you.”

Madison’s look hardened but she decided not to fight it. She took a deep breath. “We’ve decided to leave,” she said.

Alicia let out a deep breath. She felt like the oxygen had been sucked out of the room and for a minute, the world spun around her. She had to physically shake her head to bring herself back to reality. 

“My hope is that you won’t let this little love affair keep you from your family and that you’ll come with us. But we all talked about it and we can’t stay here long-term. We need to find a place with other people, more safety, a better place for us to life and not just crash in someone’s house.”

“But I don’t understand,” Alicia found words pouring from her mouth in desperation. “Why would we want to leave when this is a safe place for us? There are other apartments and other places in town that you can stay if you don’t want to be here.”

“It’s not about that,” Travis interjected. 

“Is this about me and Zoe?” Alicia asked, eyes narrowing. “I know you don’t like the idea of us being together but that’s not fair to me or to anyone else, to move everyone out just because of your opinions.”

“Alicia,” Zoe spoke gently, understanding that the other woman was on the edge and that losing control was a definite possibility at this point.

Alicia turned to her, seeing Zoe’s face through the blur of tears that she didn’t even realize were filling her eyes. “What?” she snapped. 

“You have to see this from their perspective. What does your mom have for her here? Or Ofelia or Nick or Chris? You and I have each other but they have nothing. They don’t have the sense of community that we have, or even that sense of safety. We’ve found it in each other but your family, I imagine they all feel very off-balance and out of control right now about everything. You and I have made a lot of decisions without them.”

Madison’s expression softened slightly and Travis nodded. 

“We’re not doing this out of spite,” Travis said. “You know I wouldn’t be. I actually really like Zoe and I don’t have a problem with the two of you together, but the rest of us just feel like we’re in a holding pattern. We need to find somewhere that we can have a sense of belonging too.”

“You know it’s not going to be that easy,” Zoe said. “It’s a dangerous place out there on the road and your quest for a sense of belonging might just put your family at risk.”

Travis nodded. “We know that. All of us do. We’ve been out there before, just like you have. But this is a decision that we made together. We’re leaving, tomorrow morning. Alicia, we’d like you to come with us but we understand if you chose not to.”

Alicia stood in the center of the room, mouth open, grasping for the right words. With a strangled cry, she turned and disappeared into Zoe’s bedroom. Zoe picked up Alicia’s bag off the floor. She looked at Travis and Madison with a sad look on her face. “I’ll talk to her. And I respect your decision. Ofelia has the key to the storage rooms downstairs. Take whatever you need.”

Zoe followed Alicia into the bedroom, leaving Travis and Madison outside in the living room. “I’m afraid I’ve just lost my daughter,” Madison whispered. 

“Give her time,” Travis said, wrapping his arms around Madison and pulling her into a tight hug. “We sprang this on her pretty quickly.”

In Zoe’s room, Alicia was lying on the bed on her stomach, sobbing into a pillow. Zoe put down both backpacks and crawled into bed next to her, wrapping her up, pulling her tightly against her body, and Alicia curled into her, crying into her chest until she was spent and her tears were dry. 

“No matter what happens, I lose someone I love,” Alicia’s voice was still thick with tears. 

Zoe kissed her forehead. “You lose a lot more if you don’t go with your family, though.”

“So you want me to go with them,” Alicia sat up suddenly, fury making her green eyes flash. “You just want to get rid of me like that.”

Zoe sat up too and grabbed both of Alicia’s hands in hers, gripping them tightly. “Of course not,” she said. “Don’t be silly. I love you, Alicia. I’m crazy about you and I’d gladly spend the rest of my life by your side. But I also know what it feels like to lose family. Before you came crawling in through my window, I’d lost every person I cared about and loved. I know that hurt and I don’t want you to have to live with it. I know how this game gets played, Alicia. You stay here and eventually you start to hate and resent me because I kept you from going with your family and you get tired of me and you try to go find them alone and then I spend the rest of my life hating myself because I feel like I kept you here.”

“Why don’t you come with us?”

“I like your family and friends, and most of them, I think, are fairly fond of me. But that’s not where I belong. I’m safe here. I have a home and a place where I belong. I don’t mind being by myself. In fact, I’m really uncomfortable in big groups of people. I’ve seen the shit that happens on the road. I love you. I’m crazy about you and losing you will be the hardest thing I’ve ever done. But if we’re meant to be, then fate will lead us back together.”

“Do you really believe that?” Alicia looked skeptical. 

Zoe nodded. “I have to. It’s the only way I’ll survive without you.” 

“I don’t know if I can go.”

Zoe stood up, walked over to her desk and grabbed a notebook and a pen. She sat down on the bed next to Alicia and handed them both to her. 

“Make a list of pros and cons for staying with me, and pros and cons of going with your family. I’ll go out, help them grab some supplies. I want this to be a decision you make for yourself.”

Alicia was left alone in the bedroom, the tip of the pen scratching against the paper as she wrote. The more she wrote, long columns on several pages, the more she realized that she knew what the right decision was. But the right decision was the hardest one to make. Tears dripped onto the paper, blurring ink that wasn’t dry yet. Alicia didn’t know how long she’d sat there but when Zoe came back and silently moved the notebook off her lap, Alicia had made her decision. 

The look on her face, when her eyes met Zoe’s, almost made the other woman’s heart break. She knew what she’d chosen. Zoe silenced her with a kiss when Alicia opened her mouth to speak. It reminded Alicia of their first kiss, desperation and fear, though none of the relief that had existed that day when Zoe had realized that she hadn’t been wounded. Alicia tasted new tears mixing with hers and when she pulled away, Zoe’s face was wet and her eyes were red. She looked down at Alicia’s lap, blinked a few times to clear her vision, then looked back up. 

“You need to go let your family know that you’re going with them tomorrow. I packed you a bag of gear already, just in case that was your decision.”

“You’ll be here when I come back, right?”

Zoe nodded, smiling sadly. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Alicia slipped out of the room. She found her mom and Nick in the living room, putting a few finishing touches on the pile of backpacks and sleeping bags and assorted gear in the middle of the room. 

“I’m going with you tomorrow,” Alicia said through clenched teeth, trying not to cry.

“Oh Alicia,” Madison grinned. “That’s great. I’m really happy you made that decision.”

“Hey Mom,” Nick said. “Why don’t you let me finish up here? Travis is taking a nap and I think you could do with one too. I’ll come get you when dinner’s ready.”

Madison took the hint and left, closing the apartment door behind her. Nick stood up, held open his arms, and wrapped them around Alicia when she ran into them. 

“It’s going to be ok,” he whispered, putting his chin on her head in a reassuring way. 

“Is it?” Alicia asked. “It sure doesn’t feel like it.”

“Did you ask Zoe to come with us?”

Alicia nodded and pulled away from his hug. “She feels safe here. And she knows what it’s like to be out on the road.”

“Can’t say I blame her,” Nick sighed. “I can see both sides to this and neither one is easy. Someone loses something no matter how it plays out.”

“I can’t imagine her not being beside me, though,” Alicia felt tears springing back into her eyes. “It’s only been a week and a half but I’ve gotten so used to her.”

“If it’s meant to be, it will be,” Nick said. 

“Zoe said the same thing,” Alicia smiled sadly. 

Nick grinned. “Smart girl, always knew I liked her.” 

Alicia laughed and smacked him playfully in the arm. “You just wanted to sleep with her.”

“Fair enough,” Nick agreed. “If you hadn’t gotten there first, I might have stood a chance.”

“Nope,” Zoe spoke up from where she was standing in the door of her bedroom, leaning against the frame, arms crossed over her chest. “You never had a chance.”

Nick smiled. “Can’t blame a guy for trying,” he shrugged. 

Zoe smiled and took a few steps out into the room. “I want to thank you, Nick. For everything, including being on my side when no one else was.”

“You took care of my little sister,” he said, a little uncomfortable with someone making him out to be the good guy. 

“Now it’s your turn again,” Zoe’s tone changed. The look on her face held a little fear, a little desperation. “I know you’ll keep her safe, Nick. Please, for me, don’t let anything happen to her.”

“I’ll protect her with my life,” Nick nodded. 

Alicia walked over to Zoe and wrapped her arms around her, folding her into a tight hug. Zoe cleared her throat and together the two women walked back into the bedroom. 

“Hey don’t worry about dinner tonight,” Nick called to them. “I’ve got it covered.”

Zoe waved an arm in thanks as Alicia closed the door behind them.  
\--------------  
Alicia didn’t know what she wanted to do. She was lying next to Zoe, both of them naked, their skin pressed against each other beneath the blankets. Part of her wanted to make love to her until the sun came up, another part just wanted to hold her in her arms and never let her go, and another part just want to sob and dissolve into tears until she had to put herself back together again the next morning. 

Zoe made the decision for her. She turned in the bed so they were facing each other and she kissed Alicia, hard, running her tongue across the other woman’s lower lip and gently sucking it into her mouth. When they parted, Alicia’s vision was blurred with tears and she tried to quickly wipe them away with the corner of the pillowcase. Zoe caught her hand. 

“I don’t want you to hide anything,” she said, “because I love everything about you. I want to see you tonight, the real you. But we’ve never been guaranteed anything other than the moment we’re in. So, just like any other night, let’s take advantage of the moments like we have a million more waiting for us, and like they’re our last. I want you to leave in the morning with the taste of you still on my lips.”

Alicia didn’t know what to say, so she leaned forward, losing herself in Zoe’s kiss, in her touch, in the feel of her hands on her, fingers inside her. The night stretched into eternity and disappeared in an instant and then Zoe was sitting on the edge of the bed, pulling on a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt. Alicia stopped her before the sweatshirt was on and she spent several minutes tracing the outline of the tattoo on her back. 

When Zoe finally pulled on her sweatshirt, the goosebumps on her skin had nothing to do with the cool morning air. She left the room to give Alicia a chance to get dressed and have a few moments to herself before facing her family. Alicia dressed quickly, though, not wanting to let Zoe out of her sigh for more than a few seconds and she sat at the table and watched as she and Nick cooked a big breakfast for everyone. 

Breakfast was quiet, awkward. Zoe and Alicia sat next to each other, hands held under the table. Alicia felt like maybe if she held on tightly enough, she wouldn’t have to let go. Ofelia gave Zoe back the keys to the storage rooms. Chris and Travis cleared the dishes. Finally, there was nothing more to do but leave. 

Zoe disentangled herself from Alicia’s hand for a minute and disappeared into her bedroom. She came back out a second later, holding something in one hand. She grabbed Alicia’s hand, turned her palm up, and dropped a pair of dogtags into her cupped hand. She closed the fingers around them and stood there, holding Alicia’s hand in both of hers.

“They belonged to my brother,” she said. “And someday, I’m going to want them back. You know where I am and where I’ll always be. Someday, if life gives you the opportunity, come see me again. I’ll wait for you.” 

Zoe kissed Alicia hard, not caring that everyone could see her. Alicia held onto her with a tight grip, not wanting to let go. Finally, they parted. Zoe helped everyone transfer the gear down to the alley, she went down with everyone and helped with backpacks and straps and soon, there was nothing left to do but walk away. Alicia put a soft, warm hand on Zoe’s cheek and Zoe turned towards it, kissing the palm softly, taking Alicia’s hand in hers. 

“I have to tell you goodbye now, or I’m never going to be able to say it. I love you, Alicia. Even in your darkest moments, don’t ever forget that.”

Alicia leaned forward again and kissed her. When they parted, Alicia’s lips burned with that kiss. She refused to say it was a last kiss, even in her own head. Instead, she turned, not wanting Zoe to see the tears in her eyes. Zoe said goodbye to everyone else, shook hands, watched them walk down the alley. When they turned the corner, Zoe hurried up the ladder, tossed it back up onto the roof, shut and locked the window. 

She fumbled with the keys in her pocket when she ran down the stairs. She unlocked a door, grabbed one of the several dozen bottles of bourbon and whisky and even some moonshine, locked the door behind her as she left, and went back upstairs. 

She was drunk by noon, blacked out an hour later, and only woke up long enough to vomit into the kitchen sink a few times before blissfully returning to darkness. When she woke up a few hours later, half-drunk, half-hungover, and completely pissed off, she walked into the apartment across from hers. She was so angry, so upset. She flipped over the couch, threw books at the wall, upended the kitchen table, yelled and screamed at the ceiling until her voice was hoarse. 

She should have gone with her, should have gotten over her fear. She was such a fucking coward that she couldn’t put herself in danger for a single minute even for the woman she loved. Spent, Zoe dropped to her knees in middle of the whirlwind of destruction she had caused, and sobbed. She cried until her chest hurt and her head pounded even worse than the hangover could account for. Finally, exhausted, she crawled back across the hallway, not wanting to climb into a bed that still smelled like the woman she’d said goodbye to eight hours earlier. 

Instead, she finished off the rest of the whisky and sank back into the warm embrace of oblivion. 

\----------  
Three years later

Zoe could hear voices from somewhere. They bounced around the alleys and off the brick buildings. She dropped the deer carcass she’d been carrying from the woods, resigned to leave it behind if it meant her safety. If anyone saw it, they’d see the arrow hole in its shoulder so she quickly cut out a jagged piece of flesh, trying to make it look like a hungry walker had downed the deer before wondering off to something else. She left the kill behind with some regret, though she already had enough smoked and dried meat to last through the winter.

The fresher food had lasted a little over a year and she still had several cases of MREs that she should probably be working on a little faster than she had been, though she figured they’d still be edible past their ‘use by’ date. But she wasn’t quite desperate enough to consider vegetarian lasagna or chicken fajita edible, though she did enjoy the candy and occasional other goodies she could get in them. She’d recently taken to hunting in the surrounding area, especially as the woods and wildlife had started taking over. She had deer and rabbit and even squirrel, which wasn’t half bad in a stew. 

Zoe slid her bow off her shoulder, nocked an arrow, and tried to pinpoint the location of the voices. Finally, she figured out where they were coming from. There were two men, both dressed in faded military fatigues, leaning against a rusting body of a car in the middle of the road. One was drinking from a water bottle, the other was eating a handful of something. One of the men looked older, his hair was short and gray and sweat shone on his dark skin. The one with the water bottle looked younger, his hair was longer and tied back with a bandana. 

“This town seems pretty well cleared out to me. Not a lot of supplies but not a lot of walkers either. And no hide nor hair of anyone else living here,” the younger one said, taking off his bandana and wetting it with water from the bottle. 

“I wouldn’t jump to that conclusion yet,” the older one said around a mouthful of something. “But what does it matter. Even if there are a couple people, we have two dozen armed men. There’s definitely no camp of that size set up here.”

“So do you think we’ll stay here for a while?”

“A couple months, maybe through the winter. You know Rex hates to travel when it’s cold. Fucks with his knee.”

“We’ll have to find food and supplies for all of us, and the others.”

“We can just kill them if we have to,” the old one shrugged. “Besides, the warehouse on that military base was stocked full of shit. We’ll be set for a while.”

Zoe had a bad feeling in her stomach. She didn’t like strangers in her neighborhood and she didn’t like people thinking her town was theirs. She waited in the shadows and watched the men while they took their break, then followed them when they left. 

They made their way back to the abandoned military outpost just outside of town, the one that had looked like a checkpoint or a prison to Zoe when she’d first gotten there. In the years that had passed, she’d kind of forgotten about it. At first, the bodies had smelled so bad and the risk of walkers had been high enough that she hadn’t wanted to go, then, she’d never needed to once the bodies had decayed and the walkers had wondered off. 

Now, there was more movement around the base. She came close enough, hidden by woods and brush that now grew close to the fence. She could see the armed men that the two had been talking about. They all wore some style of military camo clothing, different designs but some form of identification. There were a few armed women as well, though definitely less than the men. The women seemed to be guarding a small group of people, maybe a dozen or so, clustered in the middle of the yard. 

The small group of people were thin, dirty. They must have been the others that the young guy had been talking about. They looked like prisoners and each wore a set of shackles on their ankles. Zoe saw a man near where she was, sitting in the dirt. His pants had long ago torn and the shackles had rubbed his ankles so that there was blood pooling in the dust around his feet. The women passed out a couple water bottles to share among the group. 

Zoe shook her head. Hopefully they wouldn’t stay for the winter. Hopefully, they’d pack up and move on after a few days or weeks and she wouldn’t have to worry about them. She started to turn away, ready to head back to the safe house and hunker down for a little while, maybe fortify some defenses, when something caught her attention.

She turned back to the group in the middle of the courtyard and she felt her stomach flip. There was a man standing in the middle of the group, helping the man with the bloody feet get a drink. He seemed so weak, he could barely slurp a few drops of water from the bottle unless the young man helped him. Zoe felt sick. It was Nick. She recognized him anywhere, though his hair was a little shorter, his skin tanned dark by the sun. It was everything she could do not to rush the fence. She scanned the faces of the group now, picking out each one individually. She saw Madison, Ofelia, and there she was, the last face in the group. Alicia. 

Zoe turned and vomited into the grass as quietly as she could. Her vision swam and the world spun as she looked back at the group. It had been three years since she’d said goodbye in the alley. Since she’d lost a week of her life wallowing in alcohol and self-pity before she’d picked herself back up and gotten on with her life. There hadn’t been a single night that had passed in that time that she hadn’t gone to sleep with the memory of Alicia’s arms tight around her. 

Zoe’s grip tightened on her bow. She quickly scanned the area. There were two dozen armed guards, at least ten women, also armed. There was nothing she could do right now. But later. There was a small commotion outside the metal Quonset hut that must have been used as the main HQ for the outpost. A man stepped out of the building. He was tall, with long black hair braided halfway down his back. His skin was a smooth, tan silk and Zoe thought he must be Native American. He walked with a slight limp and suddenly, Zoe realized that this must be Rex. He limped to the group, stopped, knelt beside Alicia and cupped her chin with a gentle hand. She pulled away, glared at him. And Rex laughed, struck her with a closed fist in the face, sending her to the ground. 

Nick rushed towards him but was restrained by a pair of the armed women who put him on his knees with a swift kick to the back of the leg. 

“Little bird has some fight in her,” Rex crooned, an accent that Zoe couldn’t place making her think that she’d been wrong about his ethnicity with her first guess. “I’ll be sure to knock that out of you before too long.”

Zoe couldn’t wait anymore. She stood, pulled the arrow back and released it. It flew perfectly, though a break in the chain fence. It struck Rex in the chest, on his left side. He turned, eyes wide, already gasping for air. Zoe stood in the middle of the woods. She saw Alicia looking at her, their eyes met, and through the distance between her, Zoe hoped she understood.

I’m coming back for you, Zoe thought.

Instead of saying that, though, she yelled, “You have twenty-four hours to release your prisoners and leave, or you all die.”

“Fuck you,” someone from inside the camp yelled, the only person recovered enough to fire a shot in Zoe’s direction, though the bullet went wide and pinged off a tree trunk over her left shoulder. 

Everyone else in the camp was clustering around Rex, trying to get him off the ground, into the Quonset hut. Someone was yelling for a woman named Sheila. Zoe found the man who had fired at her. It was the old man from before. He was still aiming at her, but wasn’t willing to waste another bullet on her. 

“I hope you understand what kind of mistake you just made,” Zoe yelled. 

“What mistake is that?”

“You missed,” Zoe grinned, turned, and disappeared into the woods.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope you all are enjoying the story. I thought the time jump was important in the grand scheme of things, mainly because I think it'll be interesting to see how things have changed during the time Alicia and Zoe spent apart. I'm totally creating my own cannon completely outside that of the show, including character deaths and paths, because I haven't seen the second season (no cable) so assume that the backstory to this three year jump has nothing to do with what we are/will see in FTWD.


	11. "I Think This Just Got a Little More Complicated"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After three years, Zoe and Alicia are reunited in an unexpected way, but with Alicia's life on the line, Zoe is forced to make choices that she'd never thought she'd have to make.

Chapter 11: “I Think This Just Got a Little More Complicated”

Zoe pulled the ladder up to the roof as quietly as possible, making sure that anyone following her wouldn’t be able to hear it. She’d sprinted the whole way back to the safe house, taking sharp turns and a winding path that would have been difficult for anyone not on her tail to follow. She hung at the edge of the roof once the ladder was up until her toes touched the windowsill and climbed in the window. She shut it quietly and locked the grate. She went room to room, making sure the blinds were closed, double checked the barricades on the first floor windows and doors, made sure no lights or candles were on in the house. Then she went to the first floor, opened a duffle bag, and started loading up. 

She decided to move to the house on the edge of town. The one where she and Alicia had spent four incredible nights together so many years ago. The thought of her made it feel like someone had punched her in the stomach and she almost stopped working. She felt her lower lip start to quiver and she bit it, hard, bringing herself back to reality. She didn’t have time to fall apart. She was going to take the biggest risk of her entire life to save the woman she loved. 

Zoe loaded up the duffle bag. A 12 gauge shotgun, two boxes of shells, an AR-15, two hundred and fifty rounds of ammunition, a .45 pistol, one hundred rounds of ammunition, a tactical vest, ten MREs. She had a bugout bag already upstairs in the living room by the window with enough basic supplies to survive away from the safe house indefinitely if she had to. She also strapped on her hatchet, tucked a couple extra knives in the combat boots she’d liberated from basement storage. She shoved some extra clothes in the top of the duffle bag, some camo and black gear that she figured she might need, skulking around the woods near the outpost. She holstered her pistol, put a few extra magazines in the pouch on her belt. 

It had only taken about forty-five minutes to load everything up but the longer she stayed, the more exposed she felt. The men and women from the outpost could be combing the town looking for her, they could be close to finding her. The house was on the edge of town. Closer to the outpost if you skirted town and went through the woods, but she thought they’d be less likely to find her there. And it was a better staging ground for what she needed to do. 

Zoe stood in the living room for a few minutes, debating with herself what she wanted to do. She could torch the safe house. There was enough gasoline left in storage that the place could burn to the ground, but it would destroy all the supplies, enough for her and a large group of people to live on for the rest of their lives if they needed to. Or she could leave it, and risk Rex’s group finding it, arming themselves with even more weapons and ammunition then they had. Finally, Zoe shook her head and shouldered her backpack. She had to leave it behind, in case she ever came back. She’d keep her fingers crossed that in looking for her, they’d ignore the supplies. She’d try to leave a trail in the other direction anyway. 

She left the safe house as carefully as she could, making as little noise as possible, locking up behind her and dropping down into the alley below without using the ladder since she didn’t want to risk tossing it back up on the roof. From where she was standing, the building looked just like the other apartments in the block, with boarded up windows and pulled curtains. Zoe hoped no one would even give it a second look. 

\---------------  
Alicia felt dizzy. Zoe. She’d been standing there in the woods. She’d never forget that face. The high cheekbones, the strong chin and sharp jawline that Alicia had spent so much time kissing and touching, the strong arms, dark blonde hair, longer now and pulled back in a braid instead of a ponytail. Alicia felt a hand on her shoulder. Nick was suddenly at her side, having pushed his way through the rest of the group of prisoners. In front of them, half a dozen people were picking Rex up out of the dust and carrying him into the Quonset hut he’d just come out of. From the blood leaking out his side as they ran, it would be a miracle if he survived. 

“That was Zoe, wasn’t it?” Nick hissed in his sister’s ear.

Alicia could just nod in response. She was still in shock. 

“You have to stay strong,” Nick said, barely above a whisper so no one else could hear them. “You know she’ll come back for us.”

That brought Alicia back to reality. “And she’ll probably die in the process,” Alicia groaned. “There’s only one of her and thirty of them.”

“Don’t underestimate her,” Nick cautioned before retreating back to his position at the middle of the group. 

They were quickly rounded up by the remaining guards and hurried into a small storage shed in the corner of the outpost. It looked like it had once been used as overflow storage space for paperwork. There were still a few filing cabinets and a small desk in one corner. With the thirteen of them crammed inside, there wasn’t a lot of extra space to move. Nick helped his mother up onto the desk and with both of them sitting there, it created a little more space for everyone else. Alicia hopped up on one of the filing cabinets, her shackles banging noisily against the steel side. 

“Who was that?” someone asked. “What just happened?”

“Seems that this territory already belongs to someone else,” a woman responded. “Who knows if that’s a good thing or not.”

“Can’t be much worse,” Nick shrugged, not willing to give away any information. 

He’d obviously already cautioned Ofelia and Madison against saying anything because both women were quiet, wearing cautiously confused expressions on their face and pretending like they were following the conversation. Alicia knew the truth though. Ofelia’s eyes were bright with hope, and expression that looked almost unfamiliar on a face that had forgotten what hope felt like. Madison looked torn, partially hopeful but also remembering the last time they’d run across the beautiful young woman and she’d almost lost her daughter in the process. 

Alicia sighed and leaned back against the wall. It had been a long three years. The first six months after leaving had been a blur. She’d been locked in a dark whirlpool of depression, anger, fear. She felt threats around every corner and most nights she woke screaming into the dark, where not even her mom or Nick could help. They’d reached a small town in Arizona by a very round-about way when they were trying to cross back over to Mexico and had found safety there for almost a year with a man named Alanzo and his wife and family, as well as a few neighbors. Alicia had stayed mostly to herself, Chris had gone out hunting with several other members of the group and had never come back. They’d run into a horde. Three of them had been killed. 

Six months later, Daniel had a heart attack. She and Ofelia had become close friends in their grief, finding each other again after months of separation. Ofelia became her confidant and they spent long nights talking together. It made Alicia feel safe again and slowly the nightmares ended. At least until Rex’s group came along. It had been a year ago. There had been a lot more of them then, almost a hundred. Rex had been a big cattle farmer in Texas with a huge number of workers and people willing to take up arms and rage across the desert with him. And rage they did, burning the town to the ground and capturing almost everyone. Travis had been killed along with three others, trying to fight them off as they came across the desert like locust. 

Rex had divided the prisoners, sent half of them, including her and Nick off with one group, supposedly to sell to some contact he had near Phoenix, and he kept the rest of the group with him. Outside Phoenix, the contact never showed up, but a hundred or so walkers did, drawn by the large group of people. In the end, only about a dozen of Rex’s group and three of the prisoners were left. They’d met up with Rex outside Mexicali on the US side and found out that they’d run into trouble as well, though from raiders this time and not walkers. In the six months since they had joined together, they’d made a meandering way North, through towns and cities, sometimes stopping to fight and restock, other times just wondering through. They’d lost a few people and gained some others and until today, Alicia had managed to keep her head down and stay out of trouble.  
She just hoped that no one would notice the fact that Rex had hit her right before he’d gotten shot.

The door to the shed opened suddenly, bright light shining in and making her squint. There was a large man in the doorway with short gray hair and dark skin and with the sun silhouetting him he looked more like a monster than a man. He pointed at Alicia with a large finger. “You, come here,” he beckoned. 

Alicia groaned internally as she hopped off the filing cabinet. Someone had noticed. Nick started to move but thankfully Madison held him back. He would have just made things worse. Alicia shuffled over to the door as people quickly made room for her, happy that they hadn’t been singled out. The man grabbed Alicia by the arm, his grip hard but not rough, and helped her out of the shed. He shut the door behind her and walked her a few steps away so no one could hear their conversation. 

“Rex was talking to you before he got shot. In fact, if I’m not mistaking, he hit you before he got shot.”

Alicia nodded. 

“Why did he hit you?”

“I don’t like being touched,” Alicia looked down at the man’s hand that was still gripping her arm. 

He cleared his throat and had the decency to let her go and take a step backwards. “Rex and I have a different idea about how to do things around here. While he’s still breathing, I won’t say a word against him, though, and I suggest you don’t either.”

“So he’s still alive?” Alicia asked. 

The man nodded. “For now.”

“And if he dies, will you be in charge?”

He nodded again. “I’m Dale, by the way. Listen, that woman who shot Rex, do you know her?”

Alicia’s stomach jumped into her throat but she tried to keep her expression flat. “No,” she shook her head. “I’ve never seen her before.”

“Have your people ever been up this way?”

Alicia shook her head again. “We escaped from LA right before they bombed it on a boat and ended up in Mexico. Eventually we crossed the border to Arizona and that’s where you all found us.”

“Why’d you come back from Mexico? I’ve heard it’s better down there, more space and less walkers.”

Alicia shook her head. “It’s not. And it wasn’t my plan anyway, Travis, my mom’s boyfriend, he was the one making most of the plans. I just followed.”

Dale nodded, shoved his hands into his pockets and looked into the distance for a minute, thinking. “Guess the grass is always greener on the other side, huh.”

“What do you mean?”

“Oh, just the way that Mexico seemed safer to us but it’s because we’re not down there, you know,” Dale sucked his lower lip into his mouth and chewed on it. “That girl looked right at you. And she didn’t shoot Rex until he hit you, even though I’m pretty sure that she’d been there for a while,” he said, suddenly looking at Alicia with a hard expression on his face. 

Alicia swallowed. “I’m telling you the truth. I’ve never been here before and I don’t know who she was. Maybe she just got a good shot or maybe she thought assholes shouldn’t go around hitting people who are chained up. If you’re trying to get a name and address out of someone, you’ll need to go ask somewhere else because I don’t know anything.” 

Dale grinned at her. “You’ve got some spark,” he chuckled. “Fair enough. Like I said, Rex and I have different ideas about how to run things. I had to ask.”

Alicia nodded at him, still uncertain how to react around him. He’d been kind to her so far, and she’d never seen him rough anyone up like some of the others hand with Rex’s more relaxed style of leadership, but she’d also seen the hard, cold look in his eyes. She saw it again when he bent down in front of her, his dark eyes catching her green ones in a trap she couldn’t escape. 

“Understand though, that even though we have different ideas on how to run things, I’ll still gut you like a fish if I find out you’re lying to me. I’ll let each and every man in this camp have his way with you and I’ll let your family watch. In your worst nightmares, you haven’t come up with the things that I can do to you.”

Alicia swallowed hard. “I’ve had some pretty shitty nightmares, Dale. You’ll have to work pretty hard to keep that promise.”

Dale stood up straight again, a flash of surprise crossing his face. Alicia smiled at him, humor not reaching her eyes. 

“You’re going to have to work a little harder than that to frighten me. I haven’t had a group of a hundred guys to hide in the middle of and keep me safe for the past few years. I’ve gotten my hands dirty more than a few times. Just because I’m young and just because I’m a woman doesn’t mean that you can threaten me and play Billy Bad-Ass to scare me. I don’t know who she is and frankly, I don’t care. Now, can I go back and sit down or do you want me to stand out here like an idiot for a little while longer.”

Dale chuckled and when he grabbed Alicia by the arm to lead her back to the shed, his grip was lighter, gentler than it was the last time. 

“I sure hope I don’t have to kill you,” he said, helping her back into the shed. “I could actually get used to having you around.”  
\----------  
Zoe watched the car burn and the pillar of black smoke stretch into the sky. She hoped it was enough to get their attention. She’d not seen any scouts or run into anyone during her trip through the city. She’d decided to light the car about a mile and a half away from the safe house, hoping that anyone who came to investigate might not even pay attention to all the little shops and apartment buildings at the center of town. She also tossed a bag of M&Ms down a side street a few feet away from the car, hoping that anyone who came by might think she’d gone that way. There was a large neighborhood at the end of that side street, several apartment buildings, even a small strip mall. Hopefully, they’d get distracted looking in that area.

As soon as she was sure the car was good and burning, she took off towards her backup house. She hadn’t been there since she and Alicia had left three years ago. There were a lot of memories inside and when Zoe pushed opened the front door, it almost took her breath away. The kitchen counter where they’d eaten breakfast every morning, the couch where they’d made love. Zoe shut the door behind her, walked up the stairs to the master bedroom. Inside, with the door shut, she opened the closet and put down the duffle bag and backpack along with the rest of the supplies that had been there for years, most of it unopened, some of it no good any longer. 

Zoe checked the windows, made sure the curtains were still pulled tight, and then, in the darkness of the room, surrounded by memories, she laid down on the bed and sobbed.   
\-------------  
Alicia and the others had been brought back out into the yard to sleep. They’d been given blankets and a few sleeping bags which Nick had suggested that they open to allow two people to sleep on each one. She was proud of her brother. In the years that had passed, he’d turned into a good man and a good leader and had really stepped up when Travis had been killed, even though he’d been a prisoner. Now, she was sitting in the middle of the yard, surrounded by a few guards, as the sun went down behind the trees. 

To her left, towards the East side of town, she could see the remnants of a large column of black smoke that had been billowing up towards the sky for the past two hours. A large group had gone out to investigate it and hadn’t returned, but the smoke was stopping and there had been no gunshots so Alicia was hoping that it hadn’t had anything to do with Zoe. She watched and waited, her heart beating hard in her chest even though she was trying not to let it show. 

She heard a pair of the guards talking behind her. 

“He had an arrow in his ribs. He was puking up blood. He’s not going to make it.”

“Either way, Dale isn’t going to make an announcement until his heart stops beating.” 

“Probably already has.”

“Maybe so, but then he’s not going to say anything until everyone else gets back.”

“Well, now’s his chance.”

Alicia turned to look and saw the group coming back. A dozen armed men, looking worn out, but she didn’t see Zoe and she didn’t see any victorious faces, so she let out a silent sigh of relief. 

“Find her?” someone yelled to the group.

Someone shook their head in response and Alicia’s heart did a little flip. 

“Where’s Dale?” someone asked. 

He stepped out of the Quonset hut as if the mention of his name had called him into existence. 

“Any news?”

“No,” one of the men, the leader of the bunch it looked like, shook his head. “There was a car lit on fire up the interstate a bit. My guess is that it was supposed to get us off the trail but she made a mistake. We found something she dropped about a quarter mile away down a side street. That street leads to a lot of buildings, houses, some that look like they’ve been scavenged. My guess is that she’s hiding out down there unless she got out of town.”

Dale shoved his hands in his pockets and rocked back and forth on his heels, deep in thought for a second. “I doubt that. I think she and I have some unfinished business.”

“So what do we do now? We didn’t want to look around in the dark. Figured if she knows the area, she could get a jump on us at night.”

Dale nodded in agreement. “Makes sense, but have a group ready to go out first thing in the morning. Other than that, we’ll double up watches tonight and have a team outside the perimeter so she can’t get too close without us knowing about it. Get everyone mobilized and ready to go. I want people outside the fence as soon as possible.”

Alicia’s stomach tightened and she forced herself to lie down and pull a blanket over her head so no one could see the fear on her face. Zoe would be coming for her, tonight. She knew it. And she was terrified because of it.   
\---------------  
It was almost midnight. Zoe had been watching the camp from the crook of a nearby tree for several hours. She’d seen the five people patrolling outside the fence, watched them walk back and forth for a while, always in a random pattern, alternating between scared and bored. She’d tossed one of the rocks that she’d brought up with her a while back and they’d all come running like a bunch of scared kids, spending fifteen minutes looking for a rock and leaving a dozen different avenues to the fence open.

There were another half dozen individuals inside the fence, mostly wandering around the yard. The prisoners were sleeping in a pile in the middle, lit by a slowly dying fire and the light of a full moon, which Zoe was thankful for. She could see Alicia, pick out the shape of her body even among all the others. It was as familiar to her as her own, even though the arms were more toned, the skin tanned a darker brown, her hair pulled back in a braid similar to her own. Her chest ached with the need to feel Alicia’s arms around her again, to kiss her soft lips and it took every bit of self-control she had not to jump down from the tree and try to scale the fence. 

But Zoe was patient. And she was ready.

There was a propane tank three hundred yards away, tucked behind a tree and mostly hidden with brush. She could see the slight glint of white paint through the darkness but only because she knew where to look. She raised her AR to her face, looked down the scope, flicked off the safety with her thumb, and fired.

Having a Marine for a brother had been an added bonus. Having a brother who loved to shoot had been even better. And when the two combined, it turned Zoe into a lethal shot. The tank exploded, masking the sound of where the bullet had come from. The woods lit up as a fireball of orange took over. Sure enough, all five of the patrolling guards turned to run towards the flame. Zoe shook her head as she jumped down out of the tree, the sound of her boots hitting the ground covered by yells and shouts from both inside and outside the outpost. 

“You five, go out and see what happened. The rest of you, stay in here,” Zoe heard someone yell from inside the outpost. 

She turned and saw the older man from earlier, the one who had shot at her, and she glared at him. She’d been hoping for a complete lack of organization with their leader down for the count but it seemed like they had a backup. 

“I think this just got a little more complicated,” Zoe muttered to herself, quickly firing two shots at a pair of guards who were approaching her position.

They fell quickly, both hit in the head, and Zoe ducked behind a tree and out of the way before anyone could see where she’d been shooting from. 

“But I think I can handle this.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all are enjoying the story. I think that chapter 13 or 14 will probably be the end for this story. I'm almost done with chapter 12 so it should follow in a few days. Thank you, everyone, for the comments, kudos, and feedback. I really appreciate it.


	12. "I Told You So"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In a fight for her life, Zoe battles for an even more important prize than just emerging in one piece. Alicia struggles with herself and her own demons as her situation spirals even further out of her control.

Chapter 12: “I Told You So.”

Alicia heard gunfire, she saw the explosion. She heard Dale behind her, yelling at a group of guards and shoving them towards the gate. Then she was grabbed, forcefully, shoved towards the shed at the back of the yard. Nick was pulling her too, by the arm. 

“Get the fuck inside and stay there,” someone yelled.

She couldn’t really see faces, just shapes. It was too dark, too chaotic. Suddenly, they were inside and the door was slammed, locked, behind them. Alicia banged on the door, kicked it, until Nick pulled her back. 

“Stop,” he said, his mouth close to her ear. “We can’t do anything to help her. We just have to wait and see what happens.”

“I don’t know if I can do that,” Alicia said. 

Nick let her go. She turned to see him shrug. “I don’t think we have much of a choice.”

Outside, she heard gunshots.

\---------------

Zoe watched the rest of the guards pour out of the gate. The leader was still inside with another group. They spread out around the perimeter of the fence, making it harder to flank them. She fired three more shots at the group of guards before they could fan out and hide in the woods. Two of the bullets found their target and dropped another pair of guards. Four down, only about thirty more to go. Zoe sighed and bolted around another tree, trying to make it hard to find her.

She skirted the outside of the fence, occasionally firing when she thought she had a clear shot. She’d dropped two just inside the fence before someone caught the flash of her muzzle and she had to duck behind a tree out of the way of incoming bullets. By this time, she’d made it back around to where she’d blown up the propane tank. The trees and grass were still burning, the thick scent of pine and juniper hanging in the air. It made the guards still hanging around easier targets, but it made Zoe a better target as well. 

She fired five times quickly, only hitting one of her targets before she had to dive behind a tree from the incoming rain of bullets. She used the tree as cover, careful to scan the area to make sure no one was coming up behind her, and returned fire. She dropped three more of her attackers before she saw a pair of guards coming up on her right side and she had to drop back to take a better position. 

Ten down. 

She came around a small group of trees and saw a guard standing with his back towards her. Silently, she slipped her hatchet from her waist and buried the blade in the back of his head, just like she’d done a hundred times with walkers. When he fell, she used his weight to pull the weapon out of his skull and wiped it on his t-shirt before putting it back in her belt. 

She took out the pair of guards that had flanked her with several well-placed shots, then quickly reloaded as another guard stepped through a burning piece of forest to shoot at her. Zoe had to duck behind a tree as a bullet hit close to her face and she blinked through the stinging shrapnel that hit her face. She wasn’t sure if it had been metal or wood but she didn’t have time to care. Either way, it stung like shit and it pissed her off. She popped out from behind the tree and fired, hitting the man once in the shoulder and again in the chest as he struggled to load a new magazine. 

Zoe turned and sprinted away from the burning section of forest, deciding that she liked the element of surprise better than being able to easily see her enemy. She realized that most of the remaining guards had clustered around the gate and the yard in the outpost, falling back to a central position since they’d taken heavy casualties. Zoe smiled. It just made it easier for her to find her targets. 

She was almost two hundred yards away when she dropped the first two, and not much closer when she dropped a third one. 

Seventeen down. Halfway there, give or take a couple. 

She could see the older man in the yard yelling orders but she was too far away and her ears were ringing with the sound of gunshots so she couldn’t make out what he was saying. She fired several more times into the yard, taking out a few more guards. She saw one man and a pair of women throw down their weapons and run out the gate, away from the outpost as fast as their legs could carry them. 

Make that twenty down. 

“Enough,” the leader yelled into the woods. 

Zoe was tempted to take the shot. She was close enough, he was wide open. But she hesitated. These weren’t walkers. She could kill them easily when they were trying to kill her or hurt her friends, but she couldn’t just shoot him. She didn’t have it in her. 

“There’s been enough bloodshed tonight,” he yelled. 

“Then let your prisoners go, all of them.”

“I can’t do that,” he yelled. “I put them in that shed with some homemade chlorine gas. They’re all dead by now. Your fight is for nothing.”

Zoe felt her stomach drop. Her vision blurred and she lurched forward, her chest tightening. Alicia was dead. She had nothing to live for. 

Zoe fired until the magazine was empty. She aimed down the scope every time and each round hit its target until the group surrounding the older man had thinned to a small handful. When the magazine was empty, Zoe dropped the weapon, pulled the shotgun slung across her back and fired five 12 gauge slugs into the remaining guards. Then, it was just the two of them. 

Zoe dropped the shotgun. The older man looked at her, something resembling fear on his face but he wasn’t quite ready to be scared. Zoe was numb, dead inside. She kept going forward with sheer force of will and it was the only thing keeping her upright. She was ready to die, but she wasn’t going to let this piece of shit be the one to kill her. She wanted his blood on her hands, though. 

She pulled her hatchet out of her belt and swung. He blocked it with his rifle but Zoe was too quick. She reversed the blade, slicing the back of his hand. He yelled, dropped the rifle with one hand but kept the other hand on it and swung. 

\---------------

Alicia could hear the yelling; she could hear the screams. Through the high windows on the shed, she could see the yellow-orange flickers of fire somewhere in the distance. Her stomach was clenched in a heavy knot and she felt like she wanted to throw up, if she’d had anything on her stomach to do it with. Instead, she swallowed hard, pressed her ear against the door. 

The sound of gunshots was muffled by the door but she could still here them, an almost constant stream. It sounded like a battle going on outside and Alicia didn’t understand how some of those bullets aimed at Zoe weren’t hitting their mark. It seemed to go on forever and at the same time, was over in an instant. Zoe heard Dale’s voice over chaos. The bullets ended. His voice was muffled as well but she could make out what he was saying. 

She heard Zoe respond, demanding that he let the prisoners go, and her heart jumped in her chest. She was still alive, her voice sounded strong, not like someone who was injured or dying. 

Then she heard Dale, yelling back at Zoe, claiming that he had killed them all when he put them in the shed. He claimed that there had been gas in here and for a quick second, Alicia looked back over her shoulder, wondering if he was telling the truth. She saw faces, dirty, scared, but alive. Nick’s jaw was clenched. He swallowed hard. 

“She isn’t going to respond well to that,” he said.

Nick was right. The end of his sentence was interrupted by gunshots, a hail of them, and Alicia knew whose weapon they were coming from. She tried to slam herself against the door again. She kicked and hit and screamed, trying to let Zoe know that they were alive, that she was alive, so the woman wouldn’t do anything stupid. Zoe would do anything she could to avenge what she though was Alicia’s death.

Alicia was silenced when she heard five loud booms, closer than the other shots. She heard a guttural yell, like it was ripped out of someone’s throat. It was Zoe. Alicia fell to her knees at the door, holding her head in her hands as she started to sob. 

\---------------

Dale was stronger than she was but Zoe was faster and in some ways, she had more experience. She’d spent three years on her own, fighting walkers, sometimes a lot closer than she had hoped. And she was stronger than Dale thought. The clothing she wore hid cords of muscle. But shit, the butt of that rifle swinging at her shoulder hurt like a bitch.   
She was able to dodge most of the blow but, even glancing, it was enough to make her stumble. She held onto her hatchet with the other hand, struck at Dale, but his reach was further and she didn’t want to get too close. She could see blood dripping off his other hand, the one now dangling uselessly at his side, and was glad that her first hit had been a good one. She’d have to make her next one count.

Dale was pissed. His teeth were gritted in pain, the muscles in his neck stood out, and with a grunt, he lunged at Zoe, trying to use his size and strength against her. 

She sidestepped easily, striking with her hatchet as she passed. The blade clipped his back, a glancing blow, but still enough to find skin and cause damage. Dale growled low in his throat. 

“You should have left well enough alone. I had a good thing going here. Safety is rare in this day and age.” 

“Safety for who,” Zoe yelled. She was trying to stay in control, at least long enough to finish him off, but she was finding it difficult. “There are bodies in that shed that tell a different story about how safe it is.”

Dale laughed and Zoe saw red. She lunged, a stupid mistake. Dale hit her in the abdomen with the side of the rifle. Thankfully, Zoe saw it coming, bent into the blow, curved her body around the gun so it wasn’t as bad. It still took her breath away, and put her in a dangerous position. Dale struck with the back of his bad hand, across Zoe’s face. He yelled in pain and Zoe saw stars. She tasted blood but she wasn’t sure if it was his or hers. 

Zoe pushed against him, using the momentum to force herself away from the man. He’d dropped the rifle and was cradling his injured hand against his body. Zoe took the chance to lunge again, this time striking him in the shoulder with her hatchet. The blade bit deep, and stuck. Zoe swore loudly. It must have caught on bone. 

Dale used this chance to attack, and he did, slamming into her, driving her to the ground, slamming blows against her face and chest with his good hand. It was like a sledgehammer and it was everything she could do to use her arms to protect her body and face, to keep him from landing the blow that would take her out of the fight. At some point, the hatchet came loose and clattered uselessly beside them. 

Dale straddled Zoe as she tried to knee him, to get leverage anywhere, to get him off of her. He had a good eighty pounds on her, though, and was too far back on her hips for her to do what she needed to. Zoe saw an opening and struck with both fists, slamming into his chest. He grunted but held his place.

Dale reached down with his good hand, clamped it around Zoe’s neck. She clawed at his arm in desperation as she struggled to breathe, her hands digging long, bloody gashes as she did. Dale ignored her.

“You know what the best part about all this is?” Dale asked as Zoe’s struggle got weaker and weaker, her face turning red beneath him. 

Zoe croaked in response, unable to find the air to answer him. Her hands scrabbled in the dirt beside her, hoping for a rock or a stick, even a pile of dust, that might make her situation better.

Dale leaned in close, making sure that she could hear him before she lost consciousness.

“Those pieces of shit in the shed are still alive,” he smiled cruelly. “You died for nothing. But you’d better believe that I’m going to kill each and every one of them, very, very slowly. I might even keep you alive to watch while I do it.”

Zoe heard his words. She felt hate and desperation and fear, even though the pain. She saw black spots in her vision. But she felt something solid, and she held onto it tightly, and swung.

\---------------

Alicia didn’t know what was happening outside. She’d heard sounds, grunts and yells, voices. Then nothing. She was still on her knees at the door when it opened. She nearly fell out onto the dirt and when she looked up, she saw Zoe and she cried even harder. 

Alicia scrambled out of the shed and nearly fell into Zoe’s arms. The other woman was breathing hard. There was a dark, purple handprint on her neck. Alicia started to open her mouth, to ask a question, but Zoe silenced her with a shake of her head. There would be time for talking later. Alicia understood. She drank in the moment like she was dying of thirst and had been given a second chance. She could feel Zoe’s arms around her, the press of her body, the gentle touch even after what she’d been through. Zoe was clinging to Alicia like the woman was the only thing keeping her in this world right now and Alicia was holding on just as tightly, slowing feeling life flow back into her. 

Alicia was dimly aware of the others filing out behind her, walking around the yard, talking in small groups, but she ignored them. Instead, she stood up, took a step back, even as Zoe’s hands grasped for her and tried to pull her back in. A step away, she could finally see Zoe’s face.

It hadn’t changed much in three years. It was still the same face she’d seen in her dreams every night. The blue eyes that morphed from steel to ice to the most cloudless day depending on her mood, the long blonde hair, now pulled back in a braid instead of a ponytail. Alicia couldn’t see her arms since they were covered but she’d memorized the tattoos, still remembered them as clearly as if she had drawn them herself. 

There were tears in Zoe’s eyes, exhaustion painted on her face, something harder inside that she was carrying now, after what she’d just done. Blood was running from a busted lip down her chin and Alicia reached up and wiped it away, breaking the spell. 

“I never thought I’d see you again,” Alicia said, wiping her hand on her already dirty jeans. 

“I told you I’d be here when you got back,” Zoe smiled. 

Alicia sobbed a laugh and Zoe opened her arms again to fold Alicia into a tight hug. The two women stood there, tightly grasping each other, the only real, tangible thing that existed in their world. Zoe could feel her heartbeat against her chest and it was a feeling she never wanted to lose. 

Nick interrupted this time, with a goofy grin and a hard clap on the back. “Don’t monopolize the hero,” he jokingly scolded his sister. 

Zoe reluctantly let go of Alicia and turned to see Nick and the other survivors standing around them, all looking cautiously hopeful. She saw Madison and Ofelia as well, noticed that Travis, Chris, and Daniel were missing and thought that it was a topic best saved for another day. It was the sad reality of the world they lived in. Not everyone made it. But Alicia had, and Zoe reached out with a hand to make sure that she wouldn’t go too far away. 

Alicia caught it with one of her own, entwining their fingers, and Zoe felt safe in her grasp. 

“How are you?” Zoe asked, giving Nick a one-armed hug since her other hand was occupied. 

“Better, now,” Nick said. “Those guys picked us up almost a year ago and I thought for sure we were dead. They’ve just been dragging us around from place to place not really knowing what to do with us.”

“I’m glad he decided to stop by for a visit then,” Zoe said. “We’d better get you all out of here though. I made enough noise that any walker in the area is going to be stopping by for a look and none of you all look like you’re in fighting shape. Do you think you three can remember how to get to the safe house?”

Ofelia and Nick both nodded. Madison looked weary, probably remembering how things had been left between them years ago. Zoe shrugged it off. They’d have time to talk later. Right now, she fished the keys out of her pocket and tossed them to Ofelia. “Get them to the safe house. There are plenty of weapons scattered around right now. Grab some and go straight there. Take and use what you need. I’ll be back there tomorrow. I have to swing by my backup and grab the gear I left there.”

“I’m going with you,” Alicia started to argue, squeezing Zoe’s hand tighter. “I know you want me to be safe but I’m staying with you.”

“I know,” Zoe smiled, raising Alicia’s hand to her mouth and kissing it gently, feeling a tingle of electricity on her lips even at that. “I knew you wouldn’t give me a choice in the matter. So that’s why we’ll meet them back at the safe house tomorrow, so we don’t scare them half to death. “

“We don’t even know you. Why should we trust you?” someone from the back of the group shouted.

Zoe couldn’t tell who had spoken so she didn’t know who to address, but they all looked similar, unease and mistrust plain on their features. Zoe could understand that, given what they’d been through. Zoe just shrugged. “You don’t have to trust me. I’m sure there’s some supplies in the base, guns and ammo scattered around. You’re welcome to leave. You’re not anyone’s captive anymore. But I’m also offering a refuge for a few days, or longer. A safe place to rest your head, resupply. Leave anytime, or never. There’s more supplies in this town than I’ll use in a lifetime. Just ask them,” Zoe gestured to Madison, Ofelia, and Nick. “My hospitality doesn’t come with a price or any strings attached. If someone had shown my family kindness, they’d probably still be alive. There’s enough pain in this bullshit world and I’m just trying to get out of it with a clear conscience.”

Zoe swallowed hard at that. She’d killed a lot of people tonight. She wasn’t sure her conscience was clear anymore. But she could feel Alicia’s hand in hers. The warm, soft touch of skin that felt as familiar to her as her own, even after all this time, and she almost believed that healing was possible. Almost. 

Whoever had spoken didn’t have anything else to add, and most of the faces that Zoe could see looked a little more relaxed, a little more comfortable, though she didn’t fault them for any suspicion. 

“Zoe took us in when our group moved through town a few years ago,” Ofelia volunteered. “She put herself at risk to save me and some others when we got separated by a hoard, and then she went out to help us look for the people we lost. She saved our lives and never asked for anything in return and she’s done it again tonight.”

Nick smiled at Alicia and Zoe. “I think she may have had a little extra motivation tonight.”

Zoe rolled her eyes at him but she couldn’t help smiling back. Alicia nudged her shoulder. She looked a little embarrassed by all eyes being on her and Zoe decided it was time for them to leave. 

“Just get back to the safe house and we can work everything else out tomorrow. If you have people to get back to, you’re welcome to any supplies you need. Will you all be ok?” 

This last part was directed at her friends. At Ofelia and Nick, even Madison, who, while still looking a little wary, seemed to have softened some. 

Nick nodded. “We’ll be fine. Get out of here.”

That was all the motivation Zoe needed. She picked up her shotgun and rifle from where they’d been discarded as she walked. She handed the rifle to Alicia after reloading it with a spare magazine and the other woman slung it across her back and took Zoe’s hand again. Zoe smiled as they walked out of the compound and she felt at peace for the first time in years.

Alicia and Zoe were silent for a while they walked. Zoe couldn’t get rid of the feeling that it wasn’t real. Maybe she’d been shot. Maybe Dale had killed her and this was Heaven, if she believed in a heaven. But as they walked and reality stayed the same, she started to believe. They were near the side street they needed to turn down when Alicia stopped her. Alicia pulled Zoe off the sidewalk and onto the front porch of the house they had been passing. She paused for a moment, listening for any sounds or movement that might mean a walker nearby. She didn’t hear anything. 

Zoe turned and looked around, wondering what was going on. 

“Alicia, is everything—“ but she didn’t get to finish her sentence. 

Alicia pushed her against the front door of the house and trapped Zoe’s lips with her own. Zoe felt stars explode in her head. Her skin was on fire, her lips burned, her hands grasped for whatever part of Alicia they could touch, pulling at the edge of her shirt, cupping her cheek, the back of her neck. It felt like their first kiss, full of fear and desperation, possibility and passion. Zoe felt Alicia’s tongue on her lips and the moan that escaped her mouth was something she didn’t have any control over. She put her hands on Alicia’s shoulders and reluctantly pushed her away.

“If we don’t stop now, I’m going to start undressing you on this porch.” 

Alicia smiled. “I’m alright with that. It’s not like there are any cops around to arrest us for public nudity.”

Zoe laughed. “Let’s get to the house first.”

“House?”

“Yeah,” Zoe said, a mischievous look in her eye. “I hope you remember it. We spent some pretty memorable days there.”

“Of course I remember,” Alicia said. “I remember everything. Including you telling me that if we were meant to be, I’d find my way back to you.”

“I told you so,” Zoe kissed her lightly. 

“I didn’t believe you at the time,” Alicia said. “I missed you so much.”

Zoe felt tears pricking her eyes, threatening to run down her cheeks. She blinked them away and took a deep breath. “I missed you. But there will be time for that later. Plenty of time to go over years of regret. You’re here now, and I’m with you, and that’s all that matters. Now, let’s get to the house as quickly as we can so I can start making up for lost time.”

Alicia nodded but Zoe could still tell that she was bothered. Zoe kissed her hard, wishing that she could put her feelings into words and hoping that Alicia was able to feel the emotion behind it. She tangled her hand in Alicia’s hair and when she pulled away, Alicia’s lips were swollen from the force of the kiss. 

“I love you, Alicia Clark. I always have and I always will, no matter how much time and space separates us.”


	13. "Like You Even Have to Ask."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After their reunion, Alicia and Zoe return to some unexpected tension in the safe house.

Chapter 13: “Like You Even Have to Ask.”

Zoe fell back on the bed, breathing hard, sweat slicking her chest and back. Alicia flopped down next to her, nuzzling her face into the other woman’s neck. 

“Holy shit,” Zoe breathed, laughing into the darkness above them. “That was incredible.”

“What can I say,” Alicia mumbled. “I still have skills.”

“Mmm,” Zoe sighed. “You had a good teacher.”

Alicia lightly smacked her arm and then lazily threw a leg across Zoe’s hips. Zoe kissed her forehead and grabbed a blanket to pull over them from the bottom of the bed. 

“Do we really have to go back in the morning?”

“I think it’s already morning,” Zoe sighed. “But yes, we do. Your mom, Nick, and Ofelia will be worried if we don’t get back.”

“I’m sure they’ll understand,” Alicia nuzzled closer. 

“Get some sleep, beautiful. I’ll wake you up when the sun rises.”

“You promise you’ll be here when I wake up?”

“If I can help it, I’ll never leave your side again.”

With a happy, sleepy sound, Alicia draped an arm over Zoe’s chest and fell asleep. Zoe kept her eyes open, finding it easy. She was like a kid on Christmas morning who ended up with all the presents she’d asked for and more. She could feel Alicia’s weight against her, the even sound of her breathing, and it made her feel whole.

Slowly, the light in the bedroom paled to blue, then brighter, as the sun rose in the east. Zoe kissed Alicia awake with light kisses on her forehead and cheeks. Alicia moaned and hit the other woman with a pillow. 

“I don’t want to wake up,” Alicia growled. “I want to stay here forever.”

“That might be an option, someday,” Zoe said. “But not today. Come on, let’s get dressed and head back to the safe house. The sooner we get there, the sooner we can get back in bed.”

“I don’t know if I can be quiet enough for us to have sex when other people are around. It has been a while,” Alicia smiled shyly. 

Zoe laughed. “I have a shoulder you can bite, if you need it. And I can’t promise that I’m going to be able to keep my hands off you for very long.”

Alicia and Zoe dressed quickly. Alicia split up the gear between them with Zoe protesting the whole time, but she wanted to help. Finally, Zoe locked up the front door and the pair walked back to the safe house. 

\---------------  
The safe house was in chaos by the time Zoe and Alicia got back. Zoe climbed up through the window and into a shit show. The group had clearly divided into two, with Madison, Ofelia, Nick, and several others yelling from one side of the living room and four or five, a smaller group but equally as loud, yelling from the other. Zoe could hear pieces of the conversation as she climbed through the window, both groups too occupied to notice her presence. 

“We should just take everything, whatever we want. There are more of us then there are of her,” someone from the smaller group yelled. “We could easily take over and live here like kings while this thing blows over.”

“In case you haven’t noticed,” Ofelia shouted back, “it’s been three years. This thing isn’t going to blow over. And I sure as hell am not going to steal from the woman who saved our lives twice now. You want to take her shit, you’re going to have to go through me.”

“You’ll have to go through all of us,” Madison agreed. 

Nick leaned against the wall, hands shoved in his pockets, a dangerous look on his face. He was the first to see Zoe in the living room and he nodded in her direction, rolled his eyes. Zoe smiled, a mirthless curve of her lips that didn’t touch her eyes. 

“You guys maybe want to shut the fuck up,” Zoe yelled, her voice booming in the small space. 

Silence fell. Zoe turned to help Alicia into the living room, then turned back around to look at the two groups. 

“Jesus Christ,” Zoe sighed. “I could hear you idiots all the way down the alley, which means walkers and anyone else here could as well. I figured you’d all have a lick of sense in you after being held captive for a year, especially when it comes to keeping your head down.”

Nick snorted a laugh and both groups at least had the decency to look embarrassed. There was a man in the smaller group, though, who recovered quickly. He took a step forward and Nick pushed himself off the wall, moving closer to Zoe. 

Zoe didn’t need the help, though. She turned to look at him, her eyes flashing dangerously. “Be very careful about your next decision,” Zoe growled. “A little more blood on my hands wouldn’t make a difference to me.”

The man swallowed, stayed where he was. “We don’t think it’s fair that you have all this supplies. We want it. There are more of us than there are of you and we’re going to take it from you.”

Zoe took a step forward, she smiled, a lion hunting her prey. “You and what army?” Zoe asked. 

The man swallowed and Zoe straightened, turned so that she was addressing everyone while still keeping the nervous man in her sights. 

“I meant what I said last night. You’re welcome to stay here. There are plenty of abandoned apartments nearby, still plenty of places that haven’t been completely scavenged. The city is relatively safe. In three years, I’ve had the chance to clear most of it out. But if you stay, you’re part of a team. You help out and pitch in, otherwise, we don’t have a place for you.

“If you chose to leave, because you have someone or somewhere to get back to, then we can help you. We have some maps and supplies that will make your trip easier. I assume, though, that this idiot is your ringleader and you three went along because it’s been a while since you made your own decisions.”

One of the women standing near him nodded. The man turned and glared at her but he didn’t say anything. Obviously, he’d learned his lesson. 

“What’s your name?” Zoe asked him. 

“Cody,” he mumbled. 

“You kind of screwed things up for yourself, Cody. See, I don’t require anyone to trust me but I’m partial to people that I trust. Why on Earth would I keep you around if I think you’re going to stab me in the back.”

“You can’t just kick me out. Where am I going to go?” Cody took a step back, his face pale.

He looked scared. Zoe couldn’t blame him. The idea of getting tossed out to whatever was out there was a scary prospect. She’d been there before. Zoe turned to the other group. Alicia was standing nearby, chewing on her bottom lip pensively. She met Zoe’s eyes and nodded slightly. She’d support the other woman in whatever decision she made. 

“What do you all think? Should he stay?”

Nick shook his head. He’d resumed his position against the wall but his body was tight, coiled like a spring, ready to strike. “No way in hell,” he said. “All it would take is a little while for us to get comfortable and complacent and he’d clean the place out. I get the idea that Cody’s only interest in life is taking care of Cody.”

“And your interest in life isn’t taking care of Nick?” Cody spat. 

Nick shrugged. “Just so happens that taking care of my people benefits Nick,” he grinned. “Best of both worlds.”

“I have to agree with Nick,” Madison nodded. “Zoe gave us shelter and refuge here a long time ago and she never asked for anything in return. Well, almost nothing.”

Zoe turned and smiled at Alicia. The other woman smiled back. 

“Anyone, other than Cody, object to the idea?”

No one spoke up. Zoe turned to look at him, this time, her smile reached her eyes. She was genuinely amused. 

“The next time you try to stage a coup, make sure you actually have some support. Can I have my keys back, Ofelia.”

Ofelia handed Zoe the keys. Without another word, she left the living room and went downstairs. She returned just a couple minutes later, carrying a backpack. She thrust it at Cody. 

“It’s more than you deserve, but I always keep a few bugout bags on hand. There’s some food and water, purification tablets, matches, a survival blanket and tent, some paracord, a few other things you might need. Get the hell out of my house and out of my town. I ever see you here again, I’ll shoot you.”

Cody didn’t say anything. He couldn’t say anything. The members of his tiny group had spread out, trying to hide in the bigger group. They refused to make eye contact. He shouldered the bag, climbed out the window, and Alicia watched him walk to the end of the alley and turn onto the street. 

“Sorry about that,” Ofelia breathed once he was gone. “We were trying to talk him down and avoid a situation for you but, he made it difficult.”

Zoe shrugged. “Not a problem.”

There was a general shuffling of people in the living room. Ofelia, Nick, and Madison looked comfortable enough but no one else knew her. They didn’t really know what to do around her or what to expect. Zoe sighed. She hadn’t been around this many people since before the outbreak. Even the small camps and groups she and her little brother had stayed with had only been a couple people, maybe a family of four. Things were going to be different around here. But if it meant having Alicia in her life, different was fine by her.

“I guess I’d better go ahead and tell you my story,” Zoe spoke up. “And maybe we can get some ground rules settled. But first, I’m going to make some coffee.”

There was a happy sigh of relief as Zoe started moving around the living room to get the coffee together. 

\---------------

Zoe could see the sunlight through her closed eyes. She’d been trying to go back to sleep for the past half hour but she’d had too many things running through her mind. She could feel the warmth of Alicia’s skin against her side and the young woman moved in her sleep, cuddling closer to Zoe.

Zoe smiled. It had been three months since she’d rescued Alicia and the others. Things certainly had changed. Most of the survivors had spread out into the surrounding buildings. The safe house had been transformed, with the upper level also being used for more storage and the manufacture and processing of other supplies since there were now more hands to scavenge and more gear was coming in daily. The roof had been transformed into a garden, as had several others in the area. It had been easy finding scrap wood for the raised beds and one of the survivors had been an engineer in a past life so he designed drainage and irrigation systems. 

In one of the alleys, they’d also set up a meat processing location where they could skin and smoke and preserve their hunts that wouldn’t make the rest of the area stink. Zoe and Alicia had moved to a different building after deciding that they needed more space They lived on the left side of a duplex while Madison lived on the right side. Thankfully, Zoe thought to herself on more than one occasion, their bedroom didn’t share a wall with Madison. 

Zoe looked at the ceiling, fingers of light crawling their way across the popcorn texture, reaching out to wake Alicia, who could never sleep very long past dawn. Zoe sighed. There was still a lot to do. Winter was here, but thankfully, it was a mild one, so work hadn’t completely stopped. The group was trying to outfit most of the apartments with stoves and heaters, using a similar design to the one that Zoe had used in the safe house. Most of the buildings around here didn’t have fireplaces and if it did start to get cold, they’d be hurting. They also needed to hunt down more water barrels and the engineer was trying to figure out a way to install rooftop cisterns to each building and make indoor showers. He just hadn’t figured out a way to do it yet. 

Alicia mumbled slightly and turned towards Zoe, tossing an arm across her stomach. 

“We need curtains,” she groaned. 

“We have curtains,” Zoe pointed out, kissing her gently on the forehead.

“We need darker curtains.”

Zoe laughed. “Back at the safe house you used to get mad at me for letting you sleep too late.”

“That’s just because I wanted to spend every minute of every day with you,” Alicia stretched. 

“And now you don’t?”

Alicia opened her eyes, frowning. “That didn’t come out right.”

Zoe kissed her forehead again, relishing the normalcy of their lives. Right now, in this moment, she could almost believe that they were both young twenty-somethings, in a normal world, with nothing to worry about. These were the moments she lived for.

“You know I love you, right? I didn’t mean to say it like that.”

Zoe laughed again. “Like you even have to ask. I love you too, Alicia. Always have, always will.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A huge thank you to all of you for following me on this journey. I appreaciate all the comments and feedback. I hope you enjoyed reading Alicia and Zoe's story as much as I enjoyed writing it and I hope to bring more stories your way soon.


End file.
